Hey! I'm Trying to Relax Over Here!

The freaking work week is grueling, isn't it? Take yesterday for example; I boot up my computer at 9AM and the next thing I know it's 5:30PM and I haven't even had lunch yet. Sure, the day goes by fast when you're busy, but come on!

Like you, I have a regular, 40+ hour a week job in a field unrelated to golf. All day I'm on the phone with internal sales people and external clients talking about statistics, quotes and contract parameters. I'm a public relations consultant at a large media relations firm trying to help corporate communicators do their job better. And, as you may have been able to tell, a good portion of my day is spent trying to win new business.

Not sure how many of you are in sales, but man - it's hectic. So hectic, in fact, that a Friday evening doesn't mean it's time for fun, as much as it means I have two days "off" before I have to work on Monday.

Thus in my world (and probably for many of you too), the weekends are for relaxing. Now, with a family and a home, obviously I can't relax the entire two days, but I try to unwind whenever I can - and many times this comes in the form of golf.

Out on the course, it's just me, the ball, my club and the course (this is starting to sound like The Legend of Bagger Vance). But seriously, with golf, I can simplify my life. My objective is clear: To relax. And if I don't play well, it doesn't matter. Nope - I'm just content to be out on the course. OK, I know what you're thinking: "Sure, everyone says that after a bad round." But I really mean it - I want to play well, but if I don't, it really doesn't matter - to me, it's all about relaxing.

But this doesn't mean I don't get mad out on the course, no sir. One of my biggest peeves is someone taking themselves way too seriously during a friendly round. Like the guy who swears up and down after an errant shot. Seriously? Is this the tour? Or the person who throws their club in frustration after a double bogey. Really? I want to yell out: "Hey! I'm trying to relax over here!"



I love the people who hit one bad shot and it ruins their entire round - I mean, why do they even finish all 18 holes? If these people hit one into the pond on the second hole, they should immediately head back to the parking lot, put their clubs in the trunk and drive home. But do they? Nope. They continue on in misery for the next 16 holes and I have to listen to them complain the entire time. WTF?

Look, all I'm asking is if you're frustrated about the way you're playing, please keep it to yourself. I understand some people wear their emotions on their sleeve, but let's try to show a little self control here folks.

Golf is supposed to be fun and believe it or not, some of us are out there to relax and unwind. We don't want to play with the guy who thinks he belongs on tour and is irate over not breaking 100 that day (he really expects us to take him seriously after saying: "I'm so mad - I usually shoot in the 70's").

What ever happened to just enjoying your round? Do we really need to witness you kicking the golf cart's guts in with your soft spikes just because you left a 3-foot putt short? Talk about giving yourself high blood pressure - you labor all week and then have to deal with this crap on your day off?

Sigh. But I digress. And for good reason too - I've got work in the morning!

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Golf: A Human Sport...

I'm stuck in a catch 22. Besides Golfstinks.com, I also work in the semiconductor industry supplying manufacturers with components to make circuit boards. I'm all about electronics and developing new technology but not so much when it comes to golf. As much as these electronic gadgets supposedly make life easier, it can also take from the human aspect of it. I'm submerged knee deep in electronics on a daily basis, golfing is my way to get away from it.

To me, golf is a sport* that relies heavily on human feel, intuition, instinct, some common sense and most importantly - practice. I'm not really sure if electronics should have much play in this game we love. For example, you drop $300 on a golf GPS apparatus another $250 on a rangefinder and what does it tell you? You are 205 yards out from the green. Great, you couldn't figure that out by looking at the 200 yard marker 5 yards in front you?

Hey, if you are going to drop $500 on some gadgets to tell you where you are on a golf course, I'm sure for another $500 you can hire a pro to take the shot for you too. Just saying. In reality, what device do we need to improve our game? I know, it's called playing...a lot. Leave the rangefinder's and GPS stuff for the Navy Seals.

Electronics can be like drugs whereas we develop a dependency for them. Case in point, cellphones. We can leave the house without our wallet and not really care to turn around and go get it. If we leave without our cell...forget it, might as well be naked because that's how we feel. That being said, let's keep golf the way it was meant to be - a human sport*.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

*For those that feel golf is a game and not a sport, just replace the word sport with game and we can co-exist peacefully.

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EWGA: Give Back, Have Fun, Play Golf

In a world dominated by male sports, golf these days is typically a game that transcends the sexes. For example, the LPGA has done a somewhat decent job of reminding us that women do indeed play golf. But their not the only organization helping promote the game for ladies - there's also the EWGA.

The EWGA (Executive Women's Golf Association) has been connecting business and professional women to golf for over 20 years and has built a vast sisterhood of members across not only the United States, but also Canada and Italy to boot.

And the association knows how to have fun - their biggest event of the year, Golfpalooza, is being held in Vegas this year (former LPGA star Lorena Ochoa will not only be in attendance, but she will also be receiving the EWGA's leadership award).

But this isn't just mindless fun - the organization's charity arm (EWGA Foundation) helps young girls develop their golf skills and aids women over 30 to further their education and careers. In addition, the EWGA Foundation organizes the donation of golf equipment to those less fortunate.

With all this charity, you would think it's hard for EWGA members to actually be out on the course, but it's the exact opposite. For example, the EWGA has its own championship tournament. In fact, the EWGA Championship is the largest women's amateur golf tournament of its kind - it begins through a qualifier in your local chapter and then moving on to the regionals and finally to the championship, featuring women from all over the country (in 2011, it was in Palm Desert, CA).

I actually used to work with Mrs. Lisa Edmonds, who won the low net, 2nd flight championship a couple years ago in Madison, WI. I had a chance to speak with Lisa recently and asked her to sum-up what her experience has been like as an EWGA member:

"I joined the EWGA back in 2003 so I would have the opportunity to play golf with more women [and] my experience has been nothing but positive...Each EWGA chapter is run exclusively by volunteers, and if you join and lend a hand whenever you can, I am sure you will not be disappointed! The companionship, laughter, golf and more golf, lifetime connections and friendship you experience by being an involved member of the EWGA is more than worth the price of membership. As they say � New set of Callaway Irons � $699, Box of Lady Precept Balls � $20, Round of golf at your local golf club � $48, cost of EWGA membership and volunteering at one of our events � PRICELESS!"
- Lisa Edmonds, Secretary - EWGA Fairfield County CT Chapter

The enthuesastic way Lisa speaks about the EWGA inspired me to write this post - after all, here's a hard-working professional who's extremely passionate about golf and the EWGA allows her to truly embrace that passion.

And that's what it's all about, isn't it? Being able to embrace the things you're passionate about - regardless of if you excel at them or not. The EWGA not only helps women do that, but it also lets women discover why golf is one of the greatest games of all time: Camaraderie, competitiveness and a whole lot of fun.

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Golf Gadgets; WTF? (Part 3)

Ok, it's been a while since we did one of these but it's back. In our 3rd installment, we will delve further into the "golf training aid" market and have a look at what will bring the tour within reach for us hacks. Ding! Ding! Let's get it on!

What They Say: Using a proven and unique frame and brace design, several new features have been incorporated into the new CentreCup Pro so it promotes both the �straight-back and straight-through� PILS putting stroke and the �inside-square-inside� stroke. CentreCup Pro is the upgraded version of the best-selling CentreCup� putting aid and delivers a pure putting stroke every time - whichever method a teaching professional recommends.

What I Say: I got a better method for you. Get drunk, I'll slump you over a lowered pull up bar and you can putt til you puke. Hey, at least you'll get your money's worth.

What They Say: I don't know what they could possibly say about the "Power Swing Fan Training Aid." It's a fan...

What I Say: "It is so friggin' hot out here today! Hey Bob, break out that fan and cool us own a bit, would ya?"

What They Say: PivotPro guides you towards a correct pivot, encouraging correct golf swing fundamentals that result in proper coiling of the upper torso against the back leg. PivotPro helps you create maximum resistance that leads to more power, consistency, proper weight distribution, and footwork. It's like having your own professional golf instructor at your beck and call!

What I Say: Professional golf instructor at your beck and call? You're telling me this snow board binding on a stick is like an instructor? Hank Haney better watch out.

There it is, another successful look at golf training aids Golfstinks.com style.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!

Related Posts:
Golf Gadgets; WTF? (Part 1)
Golf Gadgets; WTF? (Part 2)

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5 Reasons They Quit Golf

As much as I love this game, there was a time when I thought about giving it up.

Even though I snapped-out-of-it and rediscovered my passion for golf, others don't. Why?

Golf is too Hard
Perhaps the most common reason is that golf is simply too hard. But is it too hard or are they just too lazy? Last year, I penned a guest post for a popular golf blog in which I asked if we're too lazy to get better at golf. Here's an excerpt:

Practice makes perfect�Or so the saying goes. What that little phrase fails to articulate is how much practice it actually takes to make things perfect. Throw in an impossibly difficult sport like golf and attaining perfection becomes perfectly ridiculous. Now don�t get me wrong, there are a select few who not only have the raw talent to be great at golf, but also have the drive to spend countless hours on the range or putting green practicing�But I�m not one of them. And I surmise not many of you are either. As far as I�m concerned: I�m just too lazy to work that hard at something I�m never going to make a living at in the first place.

Yeah, golf is hard. And some people have the guts to deal with that reality and enjoy golf anyway, while others don't.

They Hate Golf
So they tried it and hated it - meh, it happens. But how could you possibly hate a game as great as this? Well, I wrote about that also - in fact, I provided 5 reasons why people hate golf. Enjoy.

A Serious Injury
Let's face it, you would have to be in a good amount of pain to give up on a sport like golf, but it happens. Be it your back, or knees, or in my case, my foot knocked me out for a couple months - there are reasons people are forced to give up this game. Sometimes the pain makes quitting unavoidable, but other times, it can be downright inspirational. And how a returning Vet who lost a leg can take up golf is both inspirational and remarkable. Makes my foot pain look rather pathetic, actually.

They Stink
This is different than golf being too hard. When people quit because the game is too hard, it's typically because they've recently started playing and realize they don't have the time or patience to get better. But when people quit because they stink, it's typically because they are pompous asses.

For example, do you know a golf buddy who can't stand it that you win all the time? You know - they guy who makes everything a competition, but get him out on the golf course and he's less than stellar? Not being able to live with the fact that he's not as good as you at something, he quits golf never to return. Now there's a guy that takes himself way too seriously - and believe me, those people are out there!

They Lose the Will to Golf
What? Well, if you were reading this blog a couple months ago, you would know all about losing the will to golf. When we dig way down into our psyche, we realize that passions can, for one reason or another, simply burn out. There can be several causes for this. In my case, an extended lack in playing time, coupled with a shift in priorities, triggered the feeling that golf was no longer an important part of my life. While I have since come to my senses, I'm sure there are others (perhaps those who were never really passionate about the game in the first place) who will simply walk away from the sport because golf just doesn't matter all that much.

I certainly hope you never quit golf - especially because you stink, or because it's too hard. If we writers of the Golf Stinks Blog accomplish anything, it's to convey you don't have to be good at something to love it. And I certainly hope you aren't forced to give it up due to an injury or perhaps worse, lose the will to play altogether. It's true that golf is not for everyone...but if you love it, you know what keeps you coming back.

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I Might Actually Watch Golf Again...

A couple weeks back I watched a three way playoff between Haas, Mickelson and Bradley for the Northern Trust Open. This is the first time I watched golf on purpose in a long, long time. And for the first time in a long, long time I was enjoying golf on TV. Fast forward a week or so later and Stinky Golfer Chris posted about the PGA needing their own Jeremy Lin. I agree.

In the meantime, as we wait for a new star to emerge, I'm watching golf to see who will take over the throne. It's exciting times in the pro golf universe. With all that negative hoopla the media was giving golf because Tiger couldn't keep it in his pants, it's actually refreshing to see a clean slate and a top spot yet to be filled. It's all about turning the negatives into positives, right?

So, who's it going to be? Let's take a look at the top 5 in the FedExCup standings.

Rank This Week	Rank Last Week	Player	Events	Points	# of Wins	# of Top 10's	Points behind Lead	Reset Points
1	1	Kyle Stanley	6	935	1	2
2	2	Johnson Wagner	6	860	1	3	75
3	3	Phil Mickelson	5	807	1	2	128
4	6	Mark Wilson	6	802	1	2	133
5	4	Bill Haas	6	752	1	2	183

Isn't this a change of pace? Kyle Stanley leading the pack. Wait...who? Kyle Stanley? Not so bad for someone that is ranked 48th in the world. What about the #1 ranked golfer in the world, Luke Donald. Again...who? Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking these guys. I find it funny how golf, or the media rather hasn't found its star in this group of leaders.

What's the issue? Are they waiting for Tiger to mount his comeback? Come on man! It's time for new blood. There's a whole pool of young guns worthy of the limelight. These guys have such a great opportunity right under their noses. As long as they battle it out and vie for that top spot, the tour will make my TV channel rotation on Sunday afternoons. I just hope it stays interesting for a while.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Anxious for the New Season? Attend a Golf Show!

For many golfers in northern parts of the United States, this time of year can be the most frustrating. You can see the light at the end of a long, cold, off season, but mid-April never seems to arrive fast enough.

So to help cope with that last month or so before the new season starts, I recommend a trip to the closest golf expo. About a year ago, a few golf buddies and I attended the Connecticut Golf Show. This is where Stinky Golf Chris and I were first introduced to holographic balance wristbands.

While the bands were met with mixed reviews (Chris felt his helped, while I felt mine did not), it sure was fun talking (and dreaming) about how a little silicon wristband could help your golf game! That's the thing with golf shows - there's a treasure-trove of ideas for the upcoming season.

Let's take golf balls for example; As you may know, I'm a bit of an eco-friendly guy. So when I spotted the Dr. Mulligan's booth, I was intrigued. I've know about refurbished (or recycled) golf balls, but assumed they were not up to the quality of new balls. No so. I purchased two-dozen Nike One balls just on looks alone. At $20 a dozen, that was a steal. But what about the playability? Yep - that was up-to-snuff too. I couldn't tell the difference between the used and new ones.

Another golf buddy purchased one of the magnetic wristbands at one booth, while we all stepped into the long-drive simulator. There was a long-putt contest where if you sunk it, you won a free round a golf (this year there's a marshmallow chip shot contest); a row of hitting bays to test-out the latest gear; and a cigar booth that will supply your next tournament with not only cigars, but pretty ladies to sell them!

Of course, there are tons of golf resorts offering great deals on stay-and-play packages (and many had a raffle going for a free weekend). Even if you don't win, it gets the travel juices flowing for this summer's golf trip.

So don't sit at home anxious to start the season, find a golf show near you to attend. And a show in a big city isn't necessarily a better show either - for example, I've been to the NYC golf show (in Madison Square Garden) and it was rather pathetic compared to the one up here in Connecticut. Even the show up in Boston (New England Golf Expo), was on par with the one here in CT. So no need to travel far - the one closest to you should suffice in scratching that golf itch.

So while I probably won't be out on the links yet in March, I am excited about attending the golf show - hey, the 30 bucks I save on balls will make up for the $30 I blow on another golf gimmick!

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Golfstinks.com Open Book Quiz

As you probably already know, golfstinks.com is very proud of it's glossary. So proud in fact we really enjoy sharing it with our readers. That said, let's test your knowledge on what we have worked so hard at compiling and creating for you.

All you have to do is guess the correct glossary entry. We provide the definition you provide the right golfstinks.com glossary term. It's as simple as that. Now, as the title invokes, this is an open book test. Well, more of an open internet test. Feel free to use whatever means necessary to get the right answer. In other words...cheat, you do it on the course anyway.

Submit your answers to info@golfstinks.com and we will randomly select a reader with the correct answers. The winner will get a Golf Genie Practice Drills Pocket Guide! A $15 dollar value!

Let's get started:

1. when the score one puts down is somehow mysteriously lower than what they actually got (can be applied to either one particular hole or to an entire round).

2. a golf course where the holes are so close together and/or the players so bad, you're always ducking for cover from stray golf balls.

3. while putting, when the ball circles the hole before dropping into the cup.

4. the act of hitting the ball to the extreme left and then hitting it to the extreme right on the very next shot, especially if the act is done several times in unison (left, right, left, right, forward...march)!

5. the person (usually female) that drives the food cart around on a golf course to sell beer, water and snacks to the golfers.

Contest ends March 2, 2012. Good Luck!

If after this little exam you are inspired and feel you have a glossary suggestion worthy of our Average Joe Golf Glossary, submit the term and definition HERE. In the event we accept your entry and use it in our glossary, you will win a Golf Genie Tee to Green Pocket Guide as well as go down in history as part of the coolest golf site!

Hit'em long...yell FORE!

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Anyone Ever Golf in Hawaii?

Artist credit: warrenkeating.com

Me and my big mouth...

So a couple of years ago, my wife and I, my in-laws and my sister-in-law and her husband were on a family vacation in the Florida Keys.

One evening, while lounging under a few palm trees and sipping on some rum-based concoction, my aforementioned gigantic mouth blurts out: "Hey, next time, we should go to Hawaii!"

The next day, my wife reminded me of how crazy my suggestion was: "Hawaii? You realize I'm pregnant, right? When will we have time to go to Hawaii with a baby?" "Relax," I told her. "Your step sister is pregnant too. It was late, I had a few in me - no one took me seriously. We're not going to Hawaii...trust me."

Fast forward to present day. It's midnight and I just spent the last several hours online booking our flights to Hawaii. Maui, to be exact. Turns out my sister-in-law not only took me very seriously, but considered my suggestion a splendid idea to boot (babies or no babies).

Anyone ever try to book a vacation to Hawaii from the East Cost of the United States with a toddler in tow? Making the trip all in one day is an impossibility (our son would be off the wall by the 8th hour in). So we have to break-up our flights.

Initially, I tried to fly into LA and then catch a non-stop flight to Maui the next day, but it turns out to be much cheaper to go to San Diego first, then to LA and then to Maui. Yep - a flight from LA to Maui was like $300 more per-person than a flight from San Diego to LA to Maui (same airline). WTF?

Of course, you can't go to San Diego with a toddler and not go to the zoo. So we're flying into San Diego two days before our flight to Maui (via LA) and going to the zoo (now I know why I was saving all my hotel points...geesh).

So, when we finally get to Hawaii, we'll have seven days to lounge under a few palm trees while sipping on a Mai Tai (AKA: a rum-based concoction) - which is just enough time for my fat yap to suggest we all go to Greece next.

All that being said, I'm pleased to report there will be time for a round of golf while I'm in Maui...But where should I play? Since we're staying on the west coast of the island, I feel like Kapalua Plantation (home of the Hyundai Tournament of Champions) should be high on my list. Anyone ever play there?

How about other suggestions? I'll probably only have time for one round so I want to make it count. But Kapalua is pushing $300 and this trip is costing me a small fortune already - perhaps there's another awesome course with lower greens fees? Don't get me wrong, I'll go a bit more in debt for Kapalua, but I just wanted to weigh all my options first.

My trip is in April - any suggestions beforehand would be greatly appreciated! And I plan on posting about my experience on whichever course I end up playing, so stay tuned for that too.

Wish me luck!

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What if the PGA Tour Went Extinct?

Remember the old philosophical question: If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, would it make a sound? Well ponder this: If the PGA Tour were to disappear tomorrow, would anyone really care?

A couple years ago, I wrote about the economics of golf, and how the pro tours only contribute a measly 1% to golf's total economic impact.

So from a financial standpoint, the PGA Tour could dissolve overnight without much monetary backlash to the golf industry. The golf equipment and apparel machine would still be cranking-out merchandise to supply millions of weekend hacks throughout the world.

But for how long? With the tour defunct, wouldn't the average golfer begin to dwindle in numbers? Well, I guess that depends on how popular the tour is with the golfing masses to begin with. For example, a decade ago I would have been laughed at for even suggesting a post like this one - after all, the hero on tour was one of the most recognizable athletes in all of sports.

Ah, but today he's barley the shell of his former self and as a result, the PGA Tour has taken one giant leap back into obscurity. Perhaps more detrimental is that no one has taken his place. Want proof? Turn on ESPN any given Sunday an you'll see them lead the golf segment talking about Tiger's third-place finish, rather than the poor schlep who actually took home the trophy.

With no face to the organization and television ratings that are basically nonexistent, it makes you wonder if it's all worth the effort? Rolling into a new city every week and setting up shop on some corporate sponsor's dime (could have donated that money to build a new cancer wing at the local hospital or something); trotting out a B-list of tour pros to go through the motions in front of a sparse gallery of spectators; turning on the HD cameras that broadcast to an equally paltry television audience. One has to ask themselves: Does the ends justify the means?

Sure, if the PGA Tour were no longer, some diehard fans would be disappointed (not to mention some of our fellow golf bloggers) and local establishments near tour stops would miss the boost in sales. But the top pros would head over to the European Tour (which would subsequently be broadcast more frequently here in the U.S.) and golf life for you and me would pretty much remain unchanged.

Not many golfers I know are quitting because they stink - no sir, we just keep on playing no matter what the game throws at us. And perhaps that's the most fundamental point - We don't play this game because the PGA Tour is so great, we play it because golf is great (if anything, watching the scratch players gives us more of a complex).

So, what if the PGA Tour went extinct? As long as the European Tour added a stop at The Masters, I'd be happy. So perhaps I should re-phrase my question: If the PGA Tour went extinct, so what?

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Golf Questions Answered Part 3

Third time's a charm, or so it has been said. You know, I would really like to think so. Considering Golf Questions Answered...The Golfstinks.com Way! was a success and Part Dos! faired just as well, it's only natural to continue.

So, keeping with the tradition, we'll get to the general inquiries but this time around we'll touch upon some personal stuff too. Let's get to it!

Q: Why is Tiger not winning any more?
A: Let's break it down:

1. August 1996 - November 2009 - Butt load of women=butt load of wins.
2. November 2009 - present - No women=no wins. Do the math.

Q: What does John Daly carry in his pockets?
A: This took a little research.

1. 1987 - 1990 - money, bottle opener and cigarettes.
2. 1990-2010 - a lot less money, cigarettes, bad stuff we were told to 'just say no to' and a half pint.
3. 2010 - present - a copy of his album (yes, he actually recorded an album) and...cigarettes.

Q: Who's the biggest ladies' man on the tour?
A: Well, thanks to TW, you've got a better shot at bringing peace to the mideast than finding this out.

Q: If I ground my wedge in a sand trap and no one sees it, should I say anything?
A: In the words of Judge Smails: "The most important decision you can make right now is what you stand for; goodness...or badness." Come on man, Judge Smails was a fictional character! No harm no foul.

Q: What are some good drills when I'm off the course?A: Dewalt, Black & Decker or Makita. Any more questions?

Well, that wraps up another successful Q & A session. If you have any golf questions please forward them to pete@golfstinks.com. Thank you yet again and I really look forward to part 4!

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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You Golf With What?

We here at Golfstinks.com are very proud of our glossary. You will see us use the various entries in our posts from time to time. Today happens to be one of those times. I always get a kick out of those people that don't quite use the right equipment to play and we have a term called tennis shoe crowd which pretty much describes them.

tennis shoe crowd [ t�nniss shoo krowd ]

phrase

persons whom play golf so infrequently, they do not sport the usual golf styles or equipment (these people are easily spotted on the course because they are playing with vintage garage sale clubs, wearing a t-shirt or wife-beater, jean shorts and donning tennis shoes).

There's one particular time that comes to mind when the group in front of us appeared to be perfect examples of the tennis shoe crowd. They had all the tell tale signs; the vintage clubs, the swing-and-a-miss stroke play, the screaming across the fairway "Hey, watch this!" etc...you get the point. Mind you, we were also playing a local par 3 executive course known to be very relaxed.

We were making our way around the course when we came to a back-up around the 8th hole. Here's our chance to get a close-up on the group in front of us and needless to say, I did not disappoint. Boy were we in for a treat. Never in my life did I see so many non golf equipment items be used for golf.

For starters, no one had a pair of golf shoes on. Not that golf shoes are absolutely necessary but, and I s#@$ you not, one guy had work boots on and his buddy was wearing football cleats. It gets better, Johnny Unitas over there also had an Under Armour receiver glove on and on top of that we over heard him swearing it was better than any golf glove. Hey, whatever floats your boat.

Ok, so you want to explore other options when it comes to golf equipment. Fine. Although, there comes a point where I draw the line especially when it comes to safety. One of the guys in front of us steps up to the tee box and that's where I noticed the duct tape holding his club head on. Come on, are you kidding me! Old or not, at least have a set of proper clubs. Luckily, no one felt the wrath of the flying club head, which by the way did come off. Ah yes, the tennis shoe crowd.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Don't run with the crowd...

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DAWGS Golf Crossover Shoe; Versatile Comfort

So I spent my Super Bowl Sunday morning with a couple golf buddies at the indoor golf simulator, smacking balls into a screen that was projecting Teeth of the Dog Golf Course in the Dominican Republic.

And while we always have a good time at the indoor range, this wasn't just a social (or practice) session - I was also there on official Golfstinks business: I was tee-testing a new pair of DAWGS Golf shoes - the Men's Crossover (black).

Touting themselves as offering the "world's lightest golf shoe," DAWGS Golf doesn't sell your typical golf cleat. For starters, there's no leather - In fact, most of their shoes are constructed with Ethylene vinyl acetate (EVA), which gives them their lightweight properties (think Crocs with soft spikes).

However, when I was asked to review a pair of DAWGS, it was their Crossover shoe that caught my attention - the Crossovers are made of lightweight canvas and come in both black and (for the more adventuresome) houndstooth.

It wasn't just the looks of the Crossovers that caught my eye - it was the lack of a soft spike. Instead, the Crossovers feature rubber nubs that allow you to wear them both on and off the course - and that's what enticed me - that I could pull these out of my closet in the morning; drive to the course in them; play 18-holes in them; drive to the super market in them...etc, and never change my shoes!

But would they do their job on the links? (Their job, of course, is to provide both comfort and stability).

In short, my answer is yes. These Crossovers are super comfy (I actually wore them the entire day - from my round on the simulator through Tom Brady's incomplete end-zone Hail Mary) and there wasn't one slip on the teeing mat. In addition, they look pretty cool (I was wearing jeans during my test, but they look great with khakis too). At 50 bucks, these versatile shoes are well worth it.

That being said, I should add a couple caveats.

Obviously, the Crossover may not be the best shoe to wear in wet conditions. First of all they are canvas, so they will soak through. And secondly, with the rubber nubs, you may not get the stability on wet grass as you would with normal soft spikes.

Also, you may consider ordering a size up from what the measuring chart on their site tells you. They don't seem to come in half-sizes, so DAWGS Golf provides a chart to show how to measure your foot to decide which size to buy. I measured and (according to their chart) was a 9. I went with 9 and it's a smidgen tight. But when I re-read the chart for this post (after the fact), I noticed it recommends to order a size up (so, I probably should have gone with a 10).

Both of these issues seemed minor in my mind though (after all, I wore my slightly tight size 9's without complaining all day). So, I definitley recommend giving them a try if you're in the market for a multipurpose golf shoe.

And if you are, then you're in luck, because DAWGS Golf has agreed to give one of our Facebook fans a free pair of black Crossovers! Check our Facebook Page for details!

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Office Putts

A couple golf seasons ago Stinky Golfer Chris posted about betting on the course. He touched upon the various betting games we can par-take in as we play (i.e. Nassau, Wolf, Chicago, etc.). Now, I'm sure at some point most of us have come across the golfer in the group that wants to make the round more "interesting." Well, these gambling golfers have a way of convincing us we actually have a chance of winning, don't they? Those fairway sharks will get you every time.

Whatever the case may be, the chance of winning money is always intriguing. This is why we (my co-workers and I) have taken the idea of betting and golf from the course and brought it to the office environment. Playing off of the title "Office Putts," we have created a game called "Office Putz." I'm guessing you're wondering how to play.

Glad you asked. You will need one of those indoor putting cups, like this: We use the cup and not an indoor putting carpet/green because A) it's a lot cheaper B) our office is carpeted and C) our putts vary in distance, some almost 30 feet. Obviously, you will need a putter and some golf balls. Most importantly you will need a couple of suckers. Hey, it makes for good lunch hour entertainment because we only play at that time...just in case my boss is reading this.

Ok, the idea is not to be the office putz. Here's how it goes down, quite simple I might add; two or more people bet on if a person can make a putt. You either bet with or against the person, obviously. You can bet a dollar or two per putt but we like to bet something way better than money - push-ups. Yep, push-ups. Not only are we betting push-ups, but these push-ups are "on command".

I think you are getting the idea here. The loser of the bet will owe the winner X amount of push-ups (usually 5-10 per putt) as well as take on the title of office putz. It's absolutely hysterical to hear "Hey office putz, gimme 5 now!" as we are waiting for our sandwich at the deli.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Don't be a putz!

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Book Review: G.O.L.F.

Does the acronym G.O.L.F. stand for "Greatest Of Life's Frustrations" or "Game Of Limitless Fun?" Well, the author of G.O.L.F., Lane H. Luoma, will tell you it stands for both (and I think I agree).

I loved this book! I'm not sure how, but Mr. Luoma has figured out how to put down into words every single thought that's ever crossed a golfer's mind - it's truly a rollocking read! What is more, he's done a rather good job penning this book to appeal to the non-golfer too.

In the preface, Mr. Luoma states "you certainly don't have to be a golfer to enjoy this book..." After reading that statement, I thought, "sure, what non-golfer is going to take the time to read this book?" But in all honesty, this book would greatly help those non-golfers understand the ups and downs their golfing buddies (or significant others) experience.

G.O.L.F. takes you on a journey of the game from those of us who experience it - from the pros to the Joes, the book levels the playing field, ignores handicaps and explains why everyone who's ever played this game can be frustrated beyond imagination, yet still overwhelmingly smitten with it all at the same time.

For example, let's take Chapter 8: "Warning! Hazardous to your Health (Mental)." The chapter takes you through an entire round, hole-by-hole, giving examples of what a terrible score you can end up with just because of strategicly-placed hazards (bunkers, lateral water, etc.). Yet after 17 nightmarish holes, you birdie the unbelievably difficult par 5, 18th-hole to finish on a high note and restore your love of the game. That, my friends, is golf.

From how luck (both good and bad) can affect your game; to being at the mercy of Mother Nature; to taking a look at some of the more interesting rules; G.O.L.F. lays-it-out as you've never read it before (oh, you may have thought it, but seeing on the printed page is a totally different experience).

Mr. Luoma takes golfers and non-golfers alike on a facinating voyage into what it really means to play this game - from chagrin to euphoria, it's all in this book.

You can purchase Mr. Luoma's book on the G.O.L.F. website, along with some other merchandise, including framed prints from the awesome artwork contained within its pages (I totally want that "Believe" print).

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An Introduction To Golf.

Life definitely throws us curves and I'm sure we all have heard the sayings. "You play the hand you're dealt and you play it to the best of your ability." Or one of my favorites "We are given what we can handle." It's funny how everything seems to work it's way out though.

My friend never played golf before in his life. He was always into more active sports. Not saying golf is not active, it's just not as active as say...basketball. Anyway, he used to tell me that he couldn't spend 2 plus hours on a golf course when he could fit in a b-ball game in an hour and go do something else. Ok, I can see where he might be coming from...golf does take time.

Fast forwarding a year and a half later, my friend gets into a life changing accident at work. He injures his foot severely causing serious nerve and muscle damage. He does not lose the foot but he lost a lot of control. Needless to say, his "active" sport days are over. Enter golf.

So, he picks up a set of clubs and decides to give the four-letter game a go. Speaking with him recently about it he tells me "I'm hooked! Never did I think I would play this game but I love it." I find it interesting to see how people are introduced to golf. Unfortunately, my buddy found it through misfortune but it has worked out in his benefit. He gets to walk and rehab his foot, challenge himself while doing so and enjoy the company of friends. Looks to me like a classic case of turning a negative into a positive!

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Can You Lose the Will to Golf?

It sounds like such a stupid question; "Can you lose the will to golf?" You want to blurt out, "What kind of question is that???" But in reality, I think the answer to the question is yes.

Yeah, you can lose the will to golf. And it does't matter if you've been playing for one season or twenty seasons - it can happen. It happened to me this past year. For a fleeting moment early last fall, I thought of golf and felt no emotion whatsoever. Not excitement over my next round; not disgust over my previous one; nothing. It was as if the sport was irrelevant to me. The flubs didn't matter; the birdies didn't matter; the drives that careened off into the abyss didn't matter - the good, the bad and the ugly of golf were, in a word: Gone.

That fleeting moment pretty much shook me to my core. Could it be that easy to withdraw from something I held so dear for a good portion of my life? It seemed logically impossible, but emotionally, the empty feeling was there. And if I could lose the will to golf, then surely it could happen to other golfers.

Obviously, I've played my fair-share of golf over the years and I've written my fair share of golf-related articles. It would stand to reason that someone who hasn't let golf become such a part of their life would have a greater chance of losing interest in the game.

I immediately considered that the cause of the problem - that I overdosed on golf. Like an addict that finally succumbed to his devices, I was a golf junkie who had become anemic to the game due to over-consumption - too many rounds; too many equipment purchases; too many musings translated into posts for this blog.

To compound my issue, this notion of overdosing worried me further. Was I "over" golf like a teenager is "over" their former BFF? It seems ridiculous to trivialize it like that, but when you feel nothing towards something you once enjoyed, you tend to be "over" it.

But somehow I knew I wasn't "over" it. I can't explain how I knew it - I just knew. And if I wasn't over golf, then what? I didn't play all that much last year - perhaps the lack of playing time contributed to my apathy? At the time, I also had an 11-month-old (now 15 months) pulling my attention away from golf - maybe the game wasn't as important to me as it used to be? Or perhaps it was a combination of all these things?

Whatever the reason was, for that brief moment in time, I could care less about golf. But that moment passed as fast as it came and I was back out on the course in November thoroughly enjoying myself. Today, I can confidently report that I'm truly excited about playing again this spring - in fact, I'm even excited about going to the indoor golf range next weekend!

So, can you lose the will to golf (or to do anything else for that matter)? Absolutely. And even more unnerving; there may be no rhyme or reason as to why. In my case, it was a brief adulterous act in a long love affair with this game. But, I'm "over" it.

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Tax Season Golfer.

The new year has Auld Lang Syne'd it's way in bringing the resolutions and all that other happy horse crap with it. For some, the new year means a fresh start, for others it's a reason for self-improvement and for a distinct group...tax refund time! This group can easily be recognized. They were the ones that spent their lunch hour on turbotax.com the day they got their W-2's.

I'm not knocking them, I was once a part of that group. Actually, I wish I could go back to those days...so much simpler. W-2 came in, W-2 got filed, done. Not to mention it also meant golf season was getting closer. You know, I couldn't wait to get my refund check because it just so happened that some of the golf shops were still selling off last seasons stuff at discount prices and I just happened to have a little extra income, how convenient.

How times have changed. I used to be able to take a good chunk of that refund and apply it to golf and all that associated with it. Today, if I get a refund, golf and golf related stuff doesn't quite sit so high on the priority list. I guess real life gets in the way. The dream of making the tour has faded and at least I can say it's not because I didn't try, it's because I suck at golf.

The most important part for me is that golf season is approaching. Considering it's been a milder winter than normal, it looks as if I'll be getting out sooner. Oh, and to update you on my visit to Narnia in my post two weeks ago, I fought off the evil dudes, cast a couple spells, restored it back to normal and found my golf clubs. What does this have to do with tax refunds? I don't know...I was just going off a little.

Last year's golf season was a wash due to surgery and recovery but this year will be better. I didn't make a resolution this year either so why not start with one now to play more golf? This works because it's not a stretch. If I play 10 rounds it will exceed last years total. I like this resolution, it's something to look forward to.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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What is Golf Art?

My post last week about that golf bag telephone really got me thinking about why these golf nicknacks are created in the first place. And then it occurred to me that these things are, technically speaking anyhow, a form of art.

A telephone in the shape of a golf bag is art you say?

My wife has a BFA (Bachelor of Fine Arts). She's always said; "if the person who created it calls it art, then it's art." It doesn't matter if it's just a canvas splattered with paint shot out of a cannon at 500 paces - if the guy lighting the canon fuse calls it art, then we're perfectly justified in hanging it on our wall.

So let's get back to my golf bag telephone for a second. Pat from New York (who emailed me to win said phone last week) considers it art, even though I didn't. He plans on displaying it in his house with pride. And for Pat, it's not just static art, but it's functional art too (after all, it's a phone to boot). Pour yourself a glass of wine, pull up a chair and admire it, Pat!

But let's face it, when we think about golf, we think about things like the tours, or courses, or clubs & balls. When we think about the golf industry, apparel and equipment retailers come to mind. But we forget that this multi-billion dollar industry includes a place for art too. And I'm not just talking about the golf bag telephone anymore.

Take a look at the images below:




That, my friends, is golf art. I spied those at a touristy-type store in the historic district of Albuquerque. Both are created using golf things (parts of a club, a ball, tees - even the crown on the bird's head in the top photo is pieces of a soft spike)! It takes a certain breed to put those kinds of tchotchkes in your home, and I'm not among them. But you can't deny, it's art.

Of course, art also includes paintings and there is no shortage of golf paintings out there - observe the two distinctly different ones below:



My eye was drawn to painting on top, while my wife (the artist) chose the one on the bottom as being attractive.

And what about the subject in the aforementioned paintings - the courses. Are they not art in and of themselves? Walking down a quiet fairway on a perfect day - as far as I'm concerned, when you're on the golf course, you're surrounded in amazing art. The way the green distinguishes itself from the fairway and rough; the gorgeous vista from the tee; a ball that softly landed a foot from the cup - to me, this is all art - and I'm sure the course designer considered it as much. Heck, one could argue that the new forged wedge in my bag is a work of art! (OK, maybe I'm getting a little carried away).

But let's try to answer my original question: What is golf art? Perhaps an appropriate way to answer that would be to rearrange the question into a statement...

Golf is art.

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Golf Course Country Club...Crashing?

I'm pretty sure most of us have seen the movie "Wedding Crashers". If not, I recommend watching it. In short, it's a film about two bachelors (Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson) that crash weddings in search of free food, drinks and to pick up women. Call them want you want: Freeloaders, scumbags, whatever. I'm also pretty sure that the thought of doing this at least once has bounced around in our heads. Maybe as a to-do on the ol' bucket list?

A buddy of mine (ABOM), in perhaps his not so proudest of moments, informed me of a "Wedding Crashers" variation he has participated in - crashing golf tournaments. The best part is he doesn't even play golf. Naturally, my first question was "If you don't play golf, WTF are you doing at a golf tourney?" ABOM then enlightened me on his motive. He said he shows up at the end for the dinner and open bar. Intrigued I was.

"Go on...I'm listening" I replied. ABOM proceeded to fill in the details; He said the most important thing was to look the part. The golf logo hat, shirt and golf shoes he borrowed from his brother that were a size too small. He even went as far as to button the top button on his polo shirt. I was impressed by his attention to detail. I'm not sure if they do that anymore, but for someone who doesn't golf, he really did his research. ABOM's theory was to look as authentic as possible and not raise suspicion.

The story gets better. This particular tournament (which, he crashed with a co-conspirator) was, as he put it, "a perfect set-up." Meaning there was a buffet-style dinner and open bar. There were no seating arrangements or anything like that. As a matter of fact, ABOM sat at the bar and freeloaded like a bandit. "This can't get any better" he thought. Until he saw his boss, who just happened to be one of the organizers of the event.

"Crap!" he thought. Well, it was more of a slow-mo "Ohhhhhh shhhhhiiiittttt!" "I gotta get the f$#@ out of here!" As he frantically planned his escape, the thought of his boss exposing him made it even worse. All he could think about was how much of an asshole he was going to look like (not to mention the possibility of losing his job). Luckily, ABOM's accomplice was able to run interference allowing the exit strategy to be executed flawlessly. My final question to him; "Would you do it again?" His reply "Why not..."

*ABOM did make it a point to mention to me that he would only crash tournaments that do not benefit any charities. It's good to know there is honor amongst scumbags. And no, ABOM is not really me.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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