Golf: A Royal And Ancient Mess

With the marriage of Prince William and Kate Middleton today, the whole relationship thing was on my mind. As long as there have been relationships, there has also been something to screw them up. That being said, why does it seem like golf is associated with one of those things?

Whenever I want to golf, there's an issue. I'll bet that if I just lay on the couch all morning there wouldn't be a problem. As soon as I say I'm going golfing...world war III erupts and the garage needs to be organized. Wait a minute, laying on the couch is a viable reason to NOT do work around the house?

So, is there really an underlying reason why golf is a catalyst for quarreling? Maybe it's not just the actual golfing that's a problem. Could it be the extra-curricular activities after the round that ruffle the feathers? After some self-analysis I've come to the much researched conclusion that sand traps are like bars...rarely do I get out after one shot.

Now, I'm pretty sure there's a few golfers that get stuck at their local "sand trap" but, in my case there are potential dangers. This could lead to coming home late, which leads to friction and problems on the home front, which could possibly lead to an unfortunate result - the ol' split up. Golf is already an expensive sport, who would have thought it could drain you for half your net worth too?

Looking at this on a grand scale, we can use Tiger Woods, Ernie Els, Boo Weekley and Mark Calcavecchia as examples. They shelled-out a lot of dough to their ex's. All I'm saying is, don't be statistic and take a second to analyze your situations...Do the right thing.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Golf and the Environment...Enough Already!

Dear golfers of the world,

Haven't we heard enough about eco-this and eco-that? The tree-huggers already have a day dedicated to the well-being of the planet: Earth Day...and it was last Friday - I think we're good till next year, no?

It's bad enough Al Gore is running around like Chicken Little yelling the sky is falling, but now the "green" movement is encroaching on our golf games to boot.

First the environmentalists complained that golf courses messed up the local wildlife (big deal - it's not like the golf industry is BP). Then they observed that it takes a ton of water to keep a course green...not to mention a ton of chemicals (so there's a little chemical run-off - who drinks out of a stream anymore anyway)? I mean, what's next - outrage over the billions and billions of lost golf balls littering the planet? The gas used in our carts? The trees chopped to accommodate an additional 18 holes?

Don't even get me started on all the "eco-golf" websites out there: Places like Turfhugger, Golf & Environment and...of all sites to jump on the bandwagon; Golf Stinks...with posts HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE - about...yep, you guessed it...Golf and the freaking environment. When will it end?

Well, it appears no time soon. If the aforementioned wasn't eco-nauseous enough, the hippies over at Golf Refugees have developed "a set of environmental golf rules." Apparently, they feel they have the cojones large enough to petition the the USGA and R&A to alter the Rules of Golf to accommodate their new eco-rules - what silliness!

I'm so sick of hearing that golf is made up of a bunch of rich fat cats that don't care about the environmental impacts of the game they love. I say the exact opposite is true: We've taken what was once useless wilderness and turned it into something for everyone to use (well, that is...everyone that has the prim and properness to wear chinos and a collared shirt; frivolously spend on the latest golf balls, shoes and gloves; fork over a small fortune on greens fees; spend hundreds - in some cases thousands - on a decent set of golf clubs; and have a car to put it all in...preferably something with 8 cylinders that comfortably fits 7).

So please don't let all this eco-hype fool you. Golf courses are doing nothing wrong and there's no such thing as global warming. Just go about your business as usual and I hope to see you all at your local course this weekend (just ignore those yellow "caution pesticide application" signs on each tee-box - they're totally hog wash)!

Sincerely,
The Traditional Golf Industry

Author's Note: Unless your head's completely up your ass, you've realized this post is nothing but satire. That being said, it's time the powers that be in the golf industry get their heads out of their asses.

If we want our kids and our grand kids to enjoy this game, we need to make some changes ASAP. The guys over at Golf Refugees are on to something with their eco-rules - it's a lofty goal, but a necessary one. And if we can't change the rules immediately, how about an eco-tournament on the pro-tour? Just one tour stop a year where there's an eco-centric theme (perhaps it's played on a course that doesn't use pesticides).

Many people point to golf as a sport that's detrimental to the environment. Let's change that. God knows, this game can use all the help it can get.

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Golf Ball Technology Improves Your Gas Mileage!

I don't know about anywhere else in the country, but here in CT, I paid $4.03 for a gallon of gas a few days ago. And by the time you read this post I'll be filling up again for, if I'm lucky, $4.11. $4.11 a gallon!!

It's partially my fault for driving the type of car I drive. But I can't help it. I like driving a sports car. Just for the sheer enjoyment a sports car brings me, I'm willing to make a sacrifice...such as getting only 18 or 19 mpg's. But with these gas prices, I wonder how much longer I can go without taking drastic measures.

Get rid of my car? No way! Not unless it's to upgrade to something even faster and more aggressive..but that normally equals even worse gas mileage. I suppose I could look for something a little more efficient...but don't even speak to me about a hybrid! I'm certainly not ready to go that route. But thanks to the MythBusters, there may be a solution!

Pictured above is what was a relatively pedestrian Ford Taurus. Until the MythBusters got hold of it that is. It then became, well, one hell of a drive!

The question was, could the effect dimples have on a golf ball be the same on an automobile? Leave it to the MythBusters to find out! And find out they did...That Ford Taurus pictured above, when coated in a smooth coat of clay, achieved a respectable 26 MPG. However, when golf ball dimples were carved into the outer layer of clay, that MPG rating certainly did change, increasing to 29 MPG! So all I have to do is get myself some clay, use a little bit of golf ball technology and BAM! I get to have all the exhilaration I normally have in my daily commute, and actually increase my gas mileage!

Of course, this episode does beg the question, when will we see the Titleist edition of a Buick? Or the Cadillac Taylor Made Series?

You can get a look at the segment of the MythBusters episode here.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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Golf by the Numbers

What really fuels the golf market and keeps courses up and running? Pro's? Scratch golfers? Avid golfers? The answer is quite simple - the average or moderate golfer. If there are 27 million or so golfer's in the U.S. and less than 1% are pro or scratch golfers, count them out.

Ironically, a lot of pro's who can afford the game rarely pay for it or get great deals. As for avid golfers (25+ rounds per year), they only account for roughly 3-5% of the market, which leaves the average and beginners (less than 7 rounds per year).

The average golfer is statistically a mid to upper-mid working class person playing around 20 rounds a year. Funny thing is if it wasn't for this demographic, 80% of golf courses would probably shut their doors. Here's a reality check: average golfers use more golf balls, period. They or we go through 3-5 balls (or more) a round.

Let's do the math; say an average golf ball costs $1.00 times 4 balls a round times 20 rounds a year. That comes out to $80 dollars in golf balls per average golfer per season. Now multiply that times the roughly 20 million average golfers and there you have 1.6 billion dollars spent a year on golf balls. Sounds crazy, huh...how about those greens fees?

These numbers represent a driving but unheard voice in the golf community. We can take these stats and apply them to other commodities in the golf industry like clubs, apparel and accessories and get a good idea of the revenue we spill into this game we love.

What's in store for the future? I guess only time will tell...but as long as average golfers keep losing balls on the course, the golf economy will continue to drive forward...

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Love your balls.

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10 Golf Etiquette Rules Most Jackasses Ignore

I've been playing golf for over 20 years and am quite comfortable with the fact that I stink. And to be honest, I'm quite comfortable in the fact that most people I'm paired-up with also stink. I've always said: "You don't have to be good at golf to love it or play it." However, golf etiquette is another story completely and quite necessary on the golf course.

Anybody who was taught to play this game the right way knows what I'm talking about - those unspoken rules of golf that show respect to your fellow players. You know; don't step in someone's line; don't put your bag on the green; don't talk while someone is swinging; etc.

The aforementioned rules are classic and well-known. But there are other, less obvious etiquette laws that golfers ignore all the time. Below are 10 discourteous acts that many uncultivated types employ on a regular basis:

#10
Hitting on the Cart Girl
This has got to be the worst come-on ever. It's right up there with hitting on the waitress. Look, everybody knows the MOFOBETE will probably be hot - that's why she got the job in the first place. But we men inevitably devolve into gawking Cro-Magnon's and can't help but treat these girls like they're dancing on a pole instead of serving us a beer.

#9
Throwing your Clubs
I actually polled people about this in a post I wrote last year. Sure, it might be funny for the first time or two someone follows-up a wretched shot with a toss of the old club. But if that same person is constantly flinging the war sticks across the fairway, it can get annoying fast. You've heard the saying "there's no crying in baseball?" Well, there should be no temper-tantrums in golf.

#8
Talking on your Cell Phone
There's actually an entire site dedicated to cell phone behavior. In golf, unless you're waiting at the turn, there's no reason to be chatting-away while walking up the fairway. And I guarantee the conversation won't end just because it's someone's turn to hit - nope...you'll just talk softer (but not soft enough) and inevitably will end the call by saying "OK, Bye" really loudly. How about keeping the phone in your bag and on mute during the round?

#7
Texting During Someone's Swing
I know you think you're being discreet by texting instead of talking, but I can still see your stupid fingers going a mile a minute in my peripheral vision. Isn't golf hard enough without multitasking? There's no reason to: Tweet about every shot; upload course pics to your Facebook page; or checkin at the 5th hole on Foursquare. Please note the last sentence of #8.

#6
Swearing Profusely...at Yourself
It's totally cool if you want to call yourself an "asshole" after a poor shot. I get it - you're frustrated and you needed to express yourself - completely understandable. But don't go running away with it. There's absolutely no reason to carry on verbally abusing yourself over a slice you've had since the 10th grade. I mean, where is your self respect? Really, it's embarrassing - for both you and your foursome.

#5
Playing from the Wrong Tee Box
You know that pit in your stomach you get while waiting on the first hole and watching the hackers ahead of you flub all their drives? Well, I can live with that feeling...unless they are teeing-off from the back tees. There is no greater frustration than this - getting behind a bunch of clowns teeing off from the tips when it's obvious they should be playing from the forward tees. I've actually dedicated an entire post to this last year and it's perhaps one of my biggest golf-peeves. If you learn anything from this list, learn which tee-box you belong on.

#4
Excessive Use of Your GPS
Some people question if high-handicappers should own a GPS in the first place, but I'm not one of them - Even golfers who are trying to break 100 are going to benefit from knowing the exact yardage to the pin. But there comes a time when enough is enough: You don't need your GPS device on the tee-box of a par 5. And if your standing next to the 150-yard marker, you don't need to check if the course's measurements are accurate. If you're truly unsure what your distance is on your approach, by all means break-out the GPS. But using it just for the fun of it on every shot is no fun for the rest of your group (or the group behind you for that matter).

#3
Driving the Cart Like a Drunken Idiot
A good number of golfers feel like a golf cart is their own personal ATV...and most of the time alcohol is the reason for their reckless abandon. Perhaps this is why around 1,000 Americans a month are injured in golf cart accidents. Something rather juvenile overcomes people when they get behind that Plexiglas windshield. But remember - they're there as caddies, not as bumper cars.

#2
Giving Swing Advice When No One Asks for It
Who are these people and where do they come from? Every time I mention this to a fellow golfer, they agree with me: "Oh I hate that too!" But some of them must be hypocrites, because there are way too many people out on the course giving swing advice who are not qualified to do so. If you're an impromptu advice giver and are not a PGA-certified pro, please take this subtle hint: YOU'RE NOT FREAKING HELPING - YOU'RE JUST BEING AN ANNOYING PRICK!

#1
Talking about How Great you Usually Play
We all know this person: "Boy, I can't believe I just got another triple-bogey...Normally I break 80 at this course." I wanna scream at the top of my lungs; "What are you, an idiot?! We both know that's absolute bollocks!" You shouldn't even be allowed on the golf course if you're this guy. Seriously, I should be able to call in your ridiculousness along with my order on the 9th-tee. Then when we make the turn, a couple of rangers escort you to the parking lot, confiscate your clubs and send you home with a certified "never play golf again" card.

Well, now that that's off my chest, it's time for me to get out my cell phone, have a few beers, jump in a golf cart and dive like a maniac down the par 5, 11th while shouting-out swing advice to anyone within ear-shot. Happy golfing.

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Fueling A Passion For Golf

I'm a pretty big sports fan. Always have been. Although I was too young to remember, my mother tells me how my father would keep me up at night as a toddler to watch Monday Night Football. It probably dates back to those days, but ever since, I've been a huge football fan.

It was my father who really introduced me to sports. My first pro football game was with my dad and two of my friends. The first pro baseball game I attended was a Mets-Cardinals game, also with my dad, as well as my uncle and a neighbor of his. Even my first pro basketball experience, a Knicks playoff game, was with my dad and two of his work buddies.

I've tried to do the same with my boys. I've taken them to their first pro baseball game as well as their first pro basketball game. We're still working on football and a PGA Tour event is also on the horizon. I've found that a father-son connection helps create a love, or passion, for sports in general. But along the way, I've also discovered something else that has fueled my passion for sports...memorabilia.

Sports memorabilia helps keep me connected with my youth. When I first started collecting memorabilia, I did it strictly for monetary reasons. All I could think of was how, years from now, I'd be able to cash in on my acquisitions. However, as time went on, I started to realize my collection meant more to me than dollar signs. I began to realize how the thousands of sports cards, hundreds of autographs and various pieces of sports history brought me back to a time when I didn't see sports as a business. It brings me back to the days when I would come home from work at night to find my father in front of the TV watching a ball game, waiting for me to join him. It reminds me of those games I attended with my dad.

I wonder if this is a reason I don't have this same passion for golf or golf memorabilia. My father played golf a few times...found he didn't care for the game...and promptly retired his clubs. Therefore, I wasn't introduced to the game until my fellow stinky golfers lured me in roughly twelve or thirteen years ago. Had I been introduced at a younger age, I may view the game differently than I do.

Now, years later, I've gotten my boys interested in football, basketball, baseball...and somewhat, golf. I've seen this done by having me pass along my passion for the sports. However, they have seen my collection of memorabilia and have begun to show interest just as I did, and right around the same age. Maybe that's the secret.

So maybe it's time I start looking into some golf memorabilia for the boys. Then again, maybe it's time I start looking into it for myself as well. After all, I haven't completely ruled out financial gain...

Swing 'til you're happy!

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POLL: U.S. Open...Public or Private?

Fellow Americans, is this not land of the free? So, why is this years U.S. Open being held at a private course? I understand it's at the Congressional Country Club in Bethesda but that doesn't make it any better. In fact it makes it worse. Let me break this down...

Last time I checked "U.S." meant the United States, our country. This should be our tournament. In the past they have held it at municipal courses and that's the way it should be.

Diving deeper into this I realized that hosting tournaments at muni's gives the game of golf such a unique position in the world of sports. What other sport allows regular old hacks, such as you and I, to play where the pro's play. I really don't see the Yankees letting the ol' local Bronx beer league have their Thursday night softball games there. Never in a million years plus the beer can pyramid on top of the dugout might not bode well.

I think a lot of golfers would enjoy playing where their favorite golfer has played. I know I would. Not to mention it would probably attract more golfers and help out the declining golf market. According to the National Golf Foundation (NGF), they found that 37% of public courses have had to lower their course maintenance standards, and 71% have had to defer capital improvements in recent years due to financial considerations.* In a nutshell this means the courses are not kept as well as they should be...damn recession.

So what do you think?

Where should the US Open be played?

*Click here for the NGF story

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My Balls are Freezing

So my father-in-law was visiting from out of state a couple of weeks ago. One of the days during his stay, I began explaining some of the things I do to prepare for the start of the golf season (keep in mind this is a man who's never played golf in his life).

In the middle of this conversation, he walked over to my refrigerator, opened the freezer and began looking inside. After staring at him for a few moments (wondering if my golf talk was boring him), I asked if he needed something. Here was his reply:

"No, I was just looking for your golf balls."

WTF?

Me: "Pop, why would I keep my golf balls in the freezer?"

Him: "Well, I've always heard if you freeze your golf balls, they go farther. So I assumed all golfers froze their balls."

Just then my wife came in the kitchen and our conversation about frozen balls ended. But for the rest of the day, I couldn't shake the notion of golfers everywhere (save for me) having an unfair advantage all these years because they've been freezing their balls.

That night, I decided to do a little research on this frozen ball theory. Turns out, my father-in-law isn't the only one who had heard of this little trick. A Google search returned many people asking the same question: "Does freezing your golf balls make them go farther?"

Man, what people will go through to add a few extra yards to their drives. And with such an easy solution (after all, most of us have freezers), it's no wonder so many were interested in if this trick was fact or fiction.

I'm not sure how many of you have heard about freezing golf balls, but my research has led me to believe this is pure fantasy. In fact, studies have shown the exact opposite is true: Cold balls will actually travel a shorter distance (on average) than warm balls! Check out the video below from FSN Sports Science:



So I guess freezing your golf balls isn't a good idea. But what about freezing your golf clubs? Sound ridiculous? Well, don't say that to cryogenic expert and founder of the Cryogenic Institute of New England, Robin A. Rhodes:

Using a process called Nitrofreeze Cryogenic Tempering, Rhodes deep-freezes golf clubs at 300 degrees below zero inside a 24-cubic foot chamber in his Cryogenic Institute of New England office at 60 Prescott St. Deep-freezing of metals, a process first used by NASA in the 1960s, changes their microstructure, relieving stresses and producing a more consistent and uniform material, Rhodes said. As a result, the company claims that golfers get a better feel, less shaft twist for improved accuracy, a larger sweet spot and more distance.

The price tag to give your set of clubs a deep freeze? $230. Hey, it's a small price to pay for adding some distance and feel (I just don't want to know what late, great actor my clubs were cryogenically frozen next to)! You can read the full article HERE.

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Why I'm Happy Tiger Didn't Win The Masters

Before anyone gets the wrong idea about the title of this post, I'll explain. It has nothing to do with Tiger as a person. Tiger as a person will forever be viewed as, lets say, not the nicest guy you've ever heard of. But that has no bearing on this particular post.

It also has nothing to do with Tiger's ego. You know, that ego that never just comes out and says, "He played better than me." Rather, the ego just makes excuses for why he lost. That also has no bearing on this post. Nope, it's none of those things.

What makes me happy about it is the fact that, for a few days anyway, the younger and/or lesser known players on the tour got a good amount of attention at a major! Whether the PGA knows it or not, this is just what they needed! Tiger made his charge, but Charl Schwartzel played out of his mind down the stretch! Despite his Sunday meltdown, Rory Mcilroy was the biggest news for the first three days of the tournament. Some nice performances by Adam Scott, Jason Day, Luke Donald and a good Sunday from Justin Rose may have helped the PGA out by helping to improve its deficiency in the player recognition department.

As we here at Golfstinks have said previously, too many golf fans have no idea who some of these great players on the tour are. So to see some of them withstand the Tiger Woods charge, and play right along side him, if not better, the PGA couldn't ask for anything more! Some of these players are the tour's future. These players are the guys people need to know about when a tour stop comes along that Tiger doesn't think he can win (i.e. he's not participating).

We all know viewership drops when Tiger isn't there. And turnout at the tour stop itself is considerably lower. But it would probably be different if these other players were promoted properly, or even half as much as Tiger. So maybe the PGA will take this opportunity and use these performance that are fresh in the minds of golf fans.

At some point, the PGA is going to have to realize that Tiger is not going to be around forever. Better yet they should realize, for one or two reasons, the landscape of golf is changing. Either Tiger is not the player he once was, or the other players have simply caught up and no longer fear him. Either way, it's time for the PGA to take advantage.

I'm tired of having to see where Tiger finished in every update. I see that Charl Schwartzel won, but immediately after that - Tiger Woods finishes fourth (-10). What about 2nd and 3rd? What about the two guys who tied for fourth with Tiger? This is exactly what I'm talking about above. It's time for the PGA, and the media, to jump on the bandwagon of some players other than Tiger.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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Screw Full Price, I Want A Deal!

That's right, who the heck pays full price anymore? It seems this little invention called the internet has slowly put retailers in a rat race they never thought they would be in. Especially when it comes to golf gear.

We all know how expensive golf equipment can be. Is it because of the R & D that went into it? Maybe the materials used? Who cares! With new sites popping up that find deals for consumers/golfers it doesn't matter. Now the sellers have to battle it out to get the sale.

Companies like Groupon and LivingSocial have been gaining popularity featuring deals available in your area. Now, let's say we had something dedicated to finding deals for golf related stuff - like our friend Ed Abrams at Deal Tracker Golf does.

Ed offers daily deals to golfers and that's it. You don't have to worry about weeding through deals for a super discounted 7 day cruise to Libya or a mani and pedi. Who wants to golf after a french manicure?

Deal Tracker Golf offers consumers not only deals on gear, accessories and destinations, but it also focuses on making it a community with interaction from its users. Here's a little something from Ed:

"So here�s the plan: I�m happy to do the legwork for you and share my expertise. It�s all about value, whether it's the latest and greatest or a time-tested model that�s in good used condition. You, in turn, can make this your �go-to� site for good golf gear deals. Let�s have some fun with it and develop a community where we help each other with leads on good solid deals and the occasional blockbuster bargain."

Sounds like a plan to me! Deal Tracker Golf may not be the prettiest site in the world (sorry Ed), but it does appear to have some awesome deals. Keep up the good work, Mr. Abrams!

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Don't Dress Like a Fool on the Golf Course

The following is a guest post from our buddy Joe Sponcia over at Pillars of Golf. While Joe's blog is geared more toward helping golf courses succeed, he penned this post in the hopes that these fashion offenders would take the hint.

We all have a few items in our closet that have run their course, hoping if a few years pass by, the item will come back into vogue. This guide isn't for the hopeful hoarders that hold onto clothing for decades (but know not to break them out), its for the oblivious among us that still have �members only� jackets...and wear them when the mood is right.

Look, twenty years is often too long to wait for the fashion boomerang to return, not to mention kids, divorces, job failures, all-you-can-eat wing night...etc., etc. You get the picture? Here's the list:

1. Cargo shorts - Its a round of golf, not a hike up the Appalachians. Coming from the biggest gadget guy on the planet, you don't need a pocket for your brush T's, a pouch for your sky caddie, a clip for your watch, a pocket for your divot tool, another pocket for extra balls, and still another pocket for your rules book. Your belt and/or your shorts aren't �Bat belts�. Two pockets in the front and two pockets on your rump are plenty.

2. Silver-tipped belts with obligatory golf club oval thingies - Seen circa 1994-2000 and should not be seen again except at the local muni's by people who �golf� frequently and also love to violate rule number six.



3. Black shorts/black socks - Up until a year ago, I violated this one on a regular basis. I thought because I was slightly below average height, the ?look' would intimidate? Looking back, I don't know that ?Daddy Earnhardt' is the best look for the golf course. Retire it, its played.

4. Tabasco-type shirts - It happens; it shouldn't.








5. Short sleeved mock shirts - I don't care if Tiger ?slum-ho' Woods pimps this look. Adding a 1/2 inch to a Hanes T-shirt made out of ?moisture-wicking' material still doesn't look good with a pressed pair of khakis...it makes you look very douchey...like these guys.




6. Knee socks - I don't know if it's the NBA that is bringing this back or what, but too many guys are wearing socks that are too long when wearing shorts. Long socks are for keeping your ankles extra warm in the winter, not for actually covering the top of your calves. You see, people won't say to your face, �Nice socks, I think there's a putt-putt course calling your name" ...they'll just think it. You can violate the other 5 items listed before, but this one is unforgivable.

7. Bluetooth devices worn on ears - Seriously?








8. Golf Sandals - Yeah on your honeymoon maybe but not �golfing� Hackstein. No one wants to see your toe ring or ankle bracelet Martha.










9. White belts/Big guts - If you can't see your pecker when you pee...no white belt for you.










10. Giant belt buckles/belt buckles with your initials or worse, someone else's - Unless you designed the piece of metal yourself and your name rhyme's with Hory Lambargini...nope.




11. Velcro 'laces' - My son still has these at five years old; you shouldn't.
I don't want to hear about your arthritis either. If you can grip a golf club, you can tie your shoes like a man. If anything on your body makes that velcro noise, except your glove when you are removing it, please, take up lawn darts.

12. Untucked, no belt with combo elastic pants - Remember Rodney Dangerfield in the movie Back to School doing the Triple Lindy? This is golf's version. It should be called "back porch grilling casual" and should only be seen with your "World's Best Dad" apron and tongs in hand...not on the golf course.

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Variations on the Game of Golf - Project Flogton

I think we are all in agreeance by now that the game of golf needs help. We all know that fewer and fewer people play the game every year, and even less take up the game. Private courses are going public and public courses are closing their clubhouse doors. TV ratings aren't all that great and even worse if Tiger isn't playing.

So what can be done? How do we get more people out on the golf course? How can we get more people interested in the game? In my search to find the answers to the above questions, I've stumbled across an organization who is looking to get more people out on the course by using one simple idea...make the game of golf easier.

The Alternative Golf Association, or Project Flogton (Flogton being "not golf" backward) has come up with several ideas aimed at making the game easier, and therefore attracting more players. Now I'm all for getting more people out on the course and more people learning the game, but I have a few issues with some of the ideas here. Let's take a look at a few:

1. In flogton, a player can put some type of lubricant or shield on the face of their driver, therefore allowing the ball to spin less and fly straighter. I don't know about you, but to me that sounds like the golf equivalent to either corking your bat or a pitcher rubbing something on the ball. That's not making the game easier...that's cheating.

2. Mulligans are legal. OK, I really don't care all that much about this one. Every once in a while, everyone takes a mulligan. But in flogton, it's one per hole. One per hole?! Again, in comparison to other sports, that's like a do-over on strike three! Or a do-over after throwing an interception! That doesn't make the game easier, it just helps lower your score!

3. How about the "bump" rule? That's where you can move your ball to anywhere else on the course as long as it's not closer to the hole. Talk about not playing the ball as it lies! Let's do the comparison thing again. So a ball is hit to left field for a single. But you think it would be better if the ball landed in the gap so you have a better chance at scoring on the next hit. OK, just move the ball to the gap and take second. What??!!

4. Bump rule not enough? How about the hazard bump rule? Yup. It's exactly what it sounds like. Ball in a trap? No problem! Just move it out!

5. "Tee up the ball on any shot except on the green." That's literally what it says in the "guidelines." Not rules...guidelines. Does that mean you can tee it up in a trap? Can you tee it up if you're in the woods? How about if you're out of bounds? Oh wait...

6. There is no out of bounds! Look, I can appreciate what they're trying to do here. Is this going to get more people to play golf? Maybe. But if they're not actually playing golf, but altering the rules instead, then what are they really learning?

For me, I'm not sure this is helping popularize the game of golf. While some of the ideas they have in their guidlelines are things that are somewhat done anyway in a casual game (mulligans, gimmes, etc...) or temporarliy while someone is learning the game, I wouldn't base an alternate game's existence on them.

Look, either you're going to play the game or you're not. You don't change the rules of the game because it's too tough for you. Is that the right thing to do? Do you want your kid to cheat on his tests at school because it's too hard or do you want your kid to work harder? Do you want your kid to play little league baseball where they allow four strikes? Or a do-over if you drop the ball? What's next, bigger holes? Moving up the tee-boxes?

Now, all that being said, I think something like this sounds like a lot of fun! I think it would be fun for outings and tournaments! Hell, if I had the chance to play in one of these, count me in! As much as I don't like the idea of, what one could consider to be, pansying the game down...it sure does sound like it would be fun to try out. I read on the website that they had one tournament where the players were "not allowed, required" to throw the ball rather than swing at it at least once per hole. Now that's funny stuff! Myself, I feel like the game of golf could benefit by relaxing the rules.

However, I don't necessarily believe that has to be done on the professional level. I think more along the lines of just you and your golf buddies bending, not breaking, the rules a bit. I play by the rules for the most part, but I bend them once in a while also. We all do. I believe part of the issue with the declining participation in the sport has to do with the rules and the people who are sticklers for them.

Too many golfers are so fixated on the rules of the game that they forget it's just a game. All they are doing is justifying the stereotype. Put fun first. Play the game for the fun of it. If you don't take the game so seriously, you'll have a hell of a lot more fun playing it! It seems that the people at Project Flogton and Golfstinks do in fact have the same idea in mind.

Swing 'til you're happy!

Related Posts:
Variations on the Game of Golf - Disk Golf
Variations on the Game of Golf - Mini Golf
Variations on the Game of Golf - Adirondack Golf
Variations on the Game of Golf - Speed Golf
Variations on the Game of Golf - Ladder Golf

Read more »

Golf Genie iPhone App Giveaway!

A couple of months ago, we reviewed the Golf Genie Practice Drills Pocket Guide. At the time, the good folks over at Golf Genie provided a bunch of Practice Guides to give away to our readers, and boy did we give them away - to 25 lucky Golfstinks fans!

Well, now Golf Genie has released its Practice Guide app for the iPhone and our buddies over at Golf Genie have come through once again - providing us 10 free codes to give away! If you've got an iPhone, iPad or iPod Touch, don't miss out on this opportunity to win an invaluable on-course resource: The Golf Genie Practice Drills PRO app!

All you have to do to enter is send an email to info@golfstinks.com with "Golf Genie" in the subject. That's it! The first 10 emails we receive will win the app!

Good Luck Golfstinks fans!

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Golf Stinks Exclusive With Charlie Sheen

A few weeks ago I sent a crap load of emails to Charlie Sheen and his reps asking if he could answer a few questions that we had for him. Not thinking anything of it and not expecting to receive any response, I went about my business as usual...that was until last night when in my inbox sat a reply from Mr. Winning himself! He was kind enough to answer a few of my questions and I've taken the liberty of pasting them below:

-----Original message-----

From: "Pete Girotto"<pete@golfstinks.com>
To: ###############
Sent: March 31, 2011 9:23:17 PM EDT
Subject: Golfstinks is winning too!

Mr. Sheen,

We were referred to you by (name deleted for legal matters) and he had mentioned that you enjoyed some of our posts. I cannot thank you enough for reading our blog. We are huge fans of yours and support you in your current situations.

If you could be so kind to answer these questions below we would love to feature them on our blog.

1. How do you think golf could help children stay away from substance abuse?
2. Would pornstars make good cart girls?
3. What is your favorite thing about golf?

Thank you,

Pete Girotto
Golfstinks, LLC
pete@golfstinks.com
www.golfstinks.com
http://golfstinks.blogspot.com

Here's his reply:

Hey Pete, thanks for reaching out...I really enjoyed your blog posts. Here are some answers to your questions:

1. How do you think golf could help children stay away from substance abuse?

Golf is expensive and requires a lot of time. So, yes it would help children steer clear of substance abuse.

2. Would pornstars make good cart girls?

Well, that depends...what are the cart girls offering?

3. What is your favorite thing about golf?

Besides winning and the 19th hole, I would say hanging out with some friends and having a "good time" on the course.

BR,
CS

Thanks again to Mr. Sheen for taking the time to answer these questions.

Next week we have a special interview with the Bronx Zoo Cobra and Tiger Woods.

Hit'em long...yell FORE (immediately followed by APRIL FOOLS')!