I Might Actually Watch Golf Again...

A couple weeks back I watched a three way playoff between Haas, Mickelson and Bradley for the Northern Trust Open. This is the first time I watched golf on purpose in a long, long time. And for the first time in a long, long time I was enjoying golf on TV. Fast forward a week or so later and Stinky Golfer Chris posted about the PGA needing their own Jeremy Lin. I agree.

In the meantime, as we wait for a new star to emerge, I'm watching golf to see who will take over the throne. It's exciting times in the pro golf universe. With all that negative hoopla the media was giving golf because Tiger couldn't keep it in his pants, it's actually refreshing to see a clean slate and a top spot yet to be filled. It's all about turning the negatives into positives, right?

So, who's it going to be? Let's take a look at the top 5 in the FedExCup standings.

Rank This Week	Rank Last Week	Player	Events	Points	# of Wins	# of Top 10's	Points behind Lead	Reset Points
1	1	Kyle Stanley	6	935	1	2
2	2	Johnson Wagner	6	860	1	3	75
3	3	Phil Mickelson	5	807	1	2	128
4	6	Mark Wilson	6	802	1	2	133
5	4	Bill Haas	6	752	1	2	183

Isn't this a change of pace? Kyle Stanley leading the pack. Wait...who? Kyle Stanley? Not so bad for someone that is ranked 48th in the world. What about the #1 ranked golfer in the world, Luke Donald. Again...who? Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking these guys. I find it funny how golf, or the media rather hasn't found its star in this group of leaders.

What's the issue? Are they waiting for Tiger to mount his comeback? Come on man! It's time for new blood. There's a whole pool of young guns worthy of the limelight. These guys have such a great opportunity right under their noses. As long as they battle it out and vie for that top spot, the tour will make my TV channel rotation on Sunday afternoons. I just hope it stays interesting for a while.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Golf Needs Jeremy Lin

Well, if you haven't figured it out by now, it's official.  Linsanity is running wild throughout the basketball world.  Actually, make that the whole world.  Being a basketball fan, I've been sucked in.  And why shouldn't I be?  Here's an Ivy League kid who wasn't offered a scholarship by any school, went undrafted and signed as a free agent with the Golden State Warriors, was then cut by two teams before signing with the Knicks.  And supposedly was about to be cut by them if not for injury problems on their roster.

But then one game comes along and he outplays an all-star.  He starts the next game, lights it up and his coach decides he's going to "ride Lin like freakin' Secretariat."  No looking back since then.  Eleven straight good, if not great, games and a star is born. 

But it's not only Lin or the Knicks who are benefiting from this new-found stardom.  TV ratings for the Knicks are up.  Ticket prices have risen.  The international fanbase is growing again.  Hell, even stock prices for Madison Square Garden are up about six percent!  The NBA couldn't have made-up a better story!

Now, I'm not really one for the "manufactured" story, but creating a Jeremy Lin may be something the PGA wants to look into.  I mean, why not?  Look at what it's done for the NBA!  And coming off of a lockout, it couldn't have happened at a better time. 

With golf's TV ratings as low as they are, the sport's biggest star clearly not what he once was and overall interest in the game falling every year, golf needs a knight in shining armor.  Think sixteen years ago to 1996 when Tiger first came on the scene prefessionally.  That's what golf needs now in 2012. 

So who will it be?  Who knows?  How about they start with the next relatively unknown player to finish high in a tournament?  Remember, he doesn't have to be a great player, or even a player who will compete for the win in every tournament.  It just has to be a player that everyone can get behind.  Lin is not a top-ten player.  He's probably not even a top ten player at his own position, he's just on a serious hot streak.  But that's not what matters to fans.  First and foremost, it's the story that matters. 

The beauty of competitive golf is that not alot of strokes separate the best 18-hole round from someone in the middle of the pack.  So taking a player and saying he finished only four strokes back might, in actuality, be a long way behind.  But it doesn't sound like much, and that's the key.  Losing by four makes you sound like you had a good shot down the stretch.  Play that out and hope.  And you never know, maybe you catch lightning in a bottle!

Well, I don't know if this makes any sense really.  Just looking for ideas to help as usual.  Besides, who would you start with?  How about John Huh?  Who?  Exactly.  Some of you may know him now, after yesterday.  But you didn't know him two days ago, did you?  Only the hardest of the hardcore golf fans did. 
 
This is a chance for the PGA to jump on it's own Jeremy Lin-like hype.  You see what it's done for the NBA.  Why can't it do the same for the PGA?  It has to start somewhere.  Here's as good an opportunity as any.

Swing 'til you're happy!                   

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Golf Questions Answered Part 3

Third time's a charm, or so it has been said. You know, I would really like to think so. Considering Golf Questions Answered...The Golfstinks.com Way! was a success and Part Dos! faired just as well, it's only natural to continue.

So, keeping with the tradition, we'll get to the general inquiries but this time around we'll touch upon some personal stuff too. Let's get to it!

Q: Why is Tiger not winning any more?
A: Let's break it down:

1. August 1996 - November 2009 - Butt load of women=butt load of wins.
2. November 2009 - present - No women=no wins. Do the math.

Q: What does John Daly carry in his pockets?
A: This took a little research.

1. 1987 - 1990 - money, bottle opener and cigarettes.
2. 1990-2010 - a lot less money, cigarettes, bad stuff we were told to 'just say no to' and a half pint.
3. 2010 - present - a copy of his album (yes, he actually recorded an album) and...cigarettes.

Q: Who's the biggest ladies' man on the tour?
A: Well, thanks to TW, you've got a better shot at bringing peace to the mideast than finding this out.

Q: If I ground my wedge in a sand trap and no one sees it, should I say anything?
A: In the words of Judge Smails: "The most important decision you can make right now is what you stand for; goodness...or badness." Come on man, Judge Smails was a fictional character! No harm no foul.

Q: What are some good drills when I'm off the course?A: Dewalt, Black & Decker or Makita. Any more questions?

Well, that wraps up another successful Q & A session. If you have any golf questions please forward them to pete@golfstinks.com. Thank you yet again and I really look forward to part 4!

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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PGA Pay To Play

So I really wanted to go on one of my rants today. I wanted to get frustrated about the fact that, once again, the media is shoving Tiger (the third place finisher) down our throats, instead of taking a good story such as Robert Rock (the actual winner of the tournament) and running with that.

Here's a guy who has been a European pro for over 13 years now, with only 1 win under his belt. But he outplayed both Tiger and Rory (the almost completely unmentioned second place finisher), as well as the rest of the field, to take his second. Instead...it was the same old, same old.

But rather than go that direction, I want to get some opinions on another matter. This matter is, I'm sure, not new to many golf fans. But for someone like me who doesn't follow the tour, I can't seem to wrap my head around it. It's the whole appearance fee thing. I know this doesn't take place on the American tour. But paying an appearance fee is how they get some names to come out to a tournament such as the Abu Dhabi Championship. I don't know about you, but I have a slight problem with this.

For me anyway, it cheapens the tournament. The way I perceive it is, a golfer is looking at this tournament with no real interest in playing. But then they offer him money just to show up, so now he'll play? I'm sorry, but that sounds like crap to me. It sounds to me like you're running a b.s. tournament and you need to do anything you can to get people to pay attention. Is this an exhibition or is a legit tournament? Well, if you have to pay players just to show up...you tell me.

But, at the same time, I look at if from the other side. Is it a good idea? Would it get more of the tour stars to participate in more tournaments? Would some of these smaller tournaments get more attention?

Let's face it - if the PGA Tour isn't going to implement an actual season full of tournaments that matter toward some type of a real playoff system, all leading to a season ending champion, then maybe the pay-to-play system is the way to go. I hate the idea considering these players already have sponsorships, endorsements and the opportunity to win good money on the tour stops, but if that's how they can make the PGA Tour a little more exciting, then maybe that's also worthy of some consideration.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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It's Not The Clubs, It's The Player.

What a huge, steaming pile of hypocritical bull excrement! I hear that statement a lot and it always made me wonder. I mean, I'm pretty sure if you give a pro a starter set he or she will still shoot well. My issue is the whole up selling when it comes to buying clubs. I also understand the sales people need to make a living too...but to what extent?

You never see a golf club ad or commercial showcasing it's bottom of the barrel clubs. It's always the pro they sponsor smashing the ball into outer space because they are swinging the newest product. Then there are some of the golf pro's that sell clubs out of their shops. Try to tell them you want to take up the game and are looking for an inexpensive set.

The next thing you know this guy has you trying out different clubs and measuring you for a custom set. I thought "it's not the clubs, it's the player..." Yeah but their answer to that is "You can grow into these clubs." What the f%$# does that mean? I bought a nice set a few years ago with the whole "growing into them" theory and guess what...I still suck. Grow into them...I got something to grow into them.

What I want to see is a tour pro walking down the fairway while his caddy is carrying his bag full of old rusty clubs because..."It's not the clubs." That would be the best to see Tiger bust out a 3-wood with duct tape on it or even Rory have an old tube sock as a head cover. Nonetheless, whether your clubs cost $100 or $1000 just get out there and have fun.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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10 Questions with a Non-Golfer

Here at the Golf Stinks blog, we certaintly do our part in blaming the pro tours and the media for sending the wrong message about this fantastic sport.

And, while acknowledging the economy is a major factor, we still highlight things that the golf industry can do to help drive new people to the game (I'd normally add a link here to prove my point, but we've literally written so much, it will be easier for you to just look at our archive section in the right-hand sidebar).

That all being said, I thought it would be interesting to talk with a non-golfer about their perceptions of the sport. I wonder if many of the golf stereotypes are true? To that end, my brother-in-law happens to be in town and I know he's never played golf before.

Let's see what a 30-year-old non-golfer has to say about...well, golf:

Q: What type of person plays golf?
A: Retired. Retirees. And anybody else that has a lot of money and a lot of free time.

Interviewer's note: Why am I not surprised by this answer?

Q: Do you think a person has to be rich to play golf?
A: Maybe not rich, but you definitely have to have...It's an expensive hobby. Golf clubs aren't cheap. Courses aren't cheap. I think probably the cheapest thing about golf would be buying the balls.

Q: When someone mentions they play golf, what's the first thought that pops into your head?
A: I picture them in golf clothes - especially like those knickers and that hat with the poof on top.

Interviewer's note: I'm never telling anyone I play golf again.

Q: When you hear the name Tiger Woods, what comes to mind?
A: Sell-out. I think of all his merchandise, video games. I mean, I'm sure he's a good golfer and all, but his stuff is is everywhere.

Q: As a follow-up to that, what about the Tiger sex scandal?
A: It's no different than any other celeb...he was married; boinked around, blah, blah, blah...same old story.

Interviewer's note: Well put.

Q: OK, so we know you don't play golf. Have you ever held a club?
A: Yeah, at the mini golf course.

Q: So you've played mini golf - what are your impressions of that?
A: I like it. I have fond memories of hitting a ball off a couple of walls into a giant plastic castle.

Interviewer's note: This is why Caddyshack 2 sucked.

Q: You've mentioned you know the basic terms and rules in other sports like [American] football and baseball. Do you think you have a basic understanding of golf's terms and rules? Please elaborate.
A: Yeah. Get the ball in the hole in as few hits as possible and always play the ball where it lies.

Interviewer's note: "Always play the ball where it lies." At what point did we weekend golfers stop following the very fundamentals of this game? Be honest...

Q: Do you know what a birdie means in golf?
A: That's when you make it in the hole with ...[pause]... with one stroke fewer than par [looks at interviewer unsure of himself].

Interviewer: That's very good!
Non-Golfer: And I only know that from all the video games.
Interviewer: I see. The ones with Tiger Woods you mean?
Non-Golfer: Yeah [laughs].

Q: Do you think golf courses are a waste of natural resources and/or prime real estate?
A: No, because if a golf course fails, it can be easily converted into a very scenic park.

Interviewer's note: I'm totally going to use that answer.

Q: Would you ever consider taking up golf?
A: I have [thought about it], but I always figured it would be when I was older - when [I have] nothing to do and [I] need exercise.

Interviewer's note: So to this non-golfer, we're a bunch of old rich guys with nothing to do and who need exercise. Hmmmm. When you think about it, that pretty much hits every golf stereotype on the head. I think I should interview other non-golfers and see if the answers are similar. Till then...

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Tiger Wins! Now How Long Will We Have To Hear About It?

He won. And for real this time. This time it wasn't just an over-abundance of highlights showing the third place finisher. This time it wasn't the media basically handing him the win after the second round. He actually won this time! And I gotta tell ya, I'm not looking forward to hearing about it.

I can picture it already. ESPN will be dropping to their knees (as usual) for Tiger. They can't wait to just ram it down our throats. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to just avoid watching ESPN for the next couple of days. Well, outside of Monday Night Football of course.

But seriously, Friday night ESPN was already handing the tournament over to Tiger again! Do they understand there are four rounds to a golf tournament? Watching SportsCenter, I saw one of their sidebar stories state that Tiger had a "Big Lead" after the second round. So I stuck around to see how big it was. Three strokes. Really? Three strokes is considered a "Big Lead" halfway through a tournament?! Well, I guess when Tiger holds the lead it is. Even after the third round, when he lost the lead, it was still all Tiger high-lights. Zach Johnson was just an after thought.

Seriously, come on. When is that stuff gonna stop? People were growing tired of Tiger before his "transgressions." More were sick of him afterward. And now, even more are just sick and tired of him and the media who continues to just shove him down our throats! I know it's going to be all over ESPN, so the only saving grace I have is the NFL.

One place where ESPN has not lost any understanding is that the NFL comes before just about everything else. It comes before baseball. It comes before basketball. It comes before college sports (obviously this does not include World Series games or college championships and bowl games). And it certainly comes before golf. Of course, at the time of my writing, SportsCenter has yet to air. But if history is any indicator, Tiger's victory will not lead after a day an NFL Sunday. But, I can only hope.

However, could you imagine if this victory came outside of football season? I think I would physically choke on the coverage. Add another reason to the list that football is my favorite sport.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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The PGA, WWE or A Three Ring Circus?

Every so often I like to check in and see what is going on in the professional world of golf. It never ceases to amaze me the crap that actually happens. I get the feeling the PGA operates in a world of it's own. I know, I know...sad.

Let's start with Mr. Steve Williams. If you haven't been following, Tiger's ex-caddie blurted out a comment about his former boss at a recent caddies' awards party. The comment might have been considered a racist slur but Woods confirmed Williams is not a racist. The part I find amazing is there's actually a caddies' awards party...interesting.

If it was baseball, basketball or football, forget it; the media coverage would rival that of the Kardashian wedding. The feds would have gotten involved and there would have been a hearing or two. Since it's the PGA, the two spoke, shook hands and are moving forward like nothing happened.

Here's what I think: This boisterous caddie loved the attention he was getting with Tiger. Now that it's gone, he pulls this crap to be back in the spotlight. I don't know about you but I foresee Williams being a candidate for another award...Jack Ass Of The Year. Let's have a party for that.

Speaking of awards, the PGA has also decided to not award a 2011 Comeback Player Of The Year. Are they saving it for Tiger? Come on, there isn't one person on the tour that can be a possible candidate? If I followed the tour I'm sure I could nominate someone. I find it hard to believe not one golfer on the tour deserves this.

What the heck is going on? I understand that this is not a prestigious award but I'm sure it will mean a lot to someone who busted their ass to make a comeback. No? So, what you are saying is that every pro golfer on the tour did exactly the same. I don't get it...this is why I only check in every so often.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Keep it real.

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Real Golf News...

Golf, according to the USGA, consists of playing a ball with a club from the teeing ground into the hole by a stroke or successive strokes in accordance with the rules.

News, according to Merriam-Webster, is a report of recent events, previously unknown information and/or something having a specified influence or effect.

Why is it when the words "golf news" appear together, we automatically think "Who did what on the tour" or "What is Tiger Woods doing now (or who...ba-dum)?" Yes, those very thoughts did cross my mind and I'm sure a majority of you also. So, why doesn't "golf news" live up to its name and report golf related stuff that is recent, unknown or possibly influential? Who knows. Here's the part that hurts...something I missed.

As the 10th anniversary of 9/11 approaches, I sit back and think about how I, as an American and a golfer (and I use the term 'golfer' loosely), missed an event back in May that should have made "golf news" in a major way. The FDNY's 9-11 Memorial Golf Outing. Why didn't this get some sort of top billing on the golf news circuit? Oh wait, the Crowne Plaza Invitational was going on.

BULL F$%#ING S$%T!!! It's the 10th anniversary! Dude, tell me the Crowne was so big that it extended over 29 golf courses. No? It didn't? Well, I could be wrong but the FDNY's 9-11 Memorial Golf Outing did. How come we never really heard much of that? That's a golf tournament of serious magnitude. I'm sure some of you might have heard about it but I'll bet the majority did not.

Enough of the venting. This weekend let's just remember and celebrate the lives of those who paid the ultimate price for our safety and freedom. And by all means, if you know of any 9/11 memorial tournaments or fundraisers going on please comment below with the information.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Always remember...

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Life Without Golf

Okay, so maybe I've been overdoing this whole " I had surgery, poor me, and can't golf" thing for the past few months. Hey, take it easy...it was heart surgery for Pete's sake. In all reality, the violins have run their course. No more sad music for me. Yes, golf was out of the equation for the last few months but now...it's game on.

Hurricane Irene, better yet Tropical Storm Irene, ruined my chances last weekend but this weekend the weather looks clear. It's time to wreak havoc on the ol' track. I can't believe I'm actually going to get out there and play! Although, as silly as it may sound, I'm a little nervous about it. It's like my first time, again.

The whole summer without golf had me thinking; what if golf never existed? What would fill that void? Ben Hogan, Arnold Palmer, Sammy Snead, Jack Nicklaus all the way to Greg Norman, Freddy Couples, Phil Mickelson, Tiger and Rory (and every other pro for that matter) would be ordinary people. Unless they excelled in other areas.

Our website would be www.____stinks.com. That would really stink! Perhaps the word "golf" would join the ranks of the other four letter words we hack's abuse. "Get the golf outta here!" I don't know...that just doesn't seem to cut it. It doesn't flow. "Ah golf, in the drink again!" Nope, definitely doesn't work as an expletive.

What would 30 million golfers do? "Hey honey, me and the guys are going to take a 4 and a half hour walk...be back by noon." Just think, golf tournaments would be a bunch of people wandering around outside in a field getting drunk...wait a minute...that is a golf tournament!

See you out there...

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Does Golf Apparel And Equipment Fuel The "Rich Man's Sport" Stereotype?

It was at the start of a recent round that Stinky Golfer Greg and I were poking a little fun at the foursome in front us. "Hey, who do you think is winning, the red team or blue team?" I asked Greg this referring to the foursome in front of us in which two were wearing red shirts and two were in blue. Greg responded that his money was on the blue team.

This brought up further joking regarding how, several times, one member of our foursome would have to head back inside their house and change their shirt so we don't show up to the course looking like we're on a team. It's actually almost come to the point where we'll have to be on the phone with each other before our round like a couple of school girls - "What color shirt are you wearing today?" "I'm going to wear the red one so wear a different color." It's pathetic really.

But further conversation regarding our shirts lead to a simple comment regarding a common stereotype of the sport. On the subject of the shirts, Greg mentions to me that he paid only $20 or so for his moisture-wicking Champion polo. I tell him that I paid the same for the Reebok shirt I was wearing at the time. He then tells me; "If this same shirt had a Nike logo on it, it would cost $50." I agreed with him, and that led to his comment - "See, that's why some people think golf is a rich man's sport and don't take it up to begin with." I gotta say, he's got a good point.

Every golf publication, and most golf products advertised, are for the priciest apparel and products available. Think about it. When was the last time you saw a review on a new set of $150 golf clubs? When was the last time you saw a feature on the season's newest golf apparel, and in it was a $15 polo?

For further proof, I've just popped open a recent issue of Golf Magazine. Of the first ten advertisements, six of them are for golf equipment. Of the six, three of the ads are for drivers costing between $400-$500, a $700 set of clubs, a $200 fairway wood and another driver costing $300. As a matter of fact, it isn't until you are 90-plus pages in before an "affordable" set of clubs is advertised.

Do you see what I mean? What is someone new to the sport, or just getting involved supposed to do? They are bombarded with the idea that they have to pay a lot of money to play this sport. And all you have to do to for proof of this is pick up a golf magazine.

Thankfully, my buddies who got me involved in this sport years ago had steered me in the right direction. I paid $150 for my first set of golf clubs, woods included! And I carried them for twelve or thirteen years. Now that may sound ridiculous to many of you, but even more ridiculous is that I still carry one of the clubs from that set! And it's quite possibly the most consistent club in my bag!

I don't think I've ever purchased a polo specifically for golf, and I don't recall any of them having been one of those $50-$60 type. Had it not been for my buddies, I may have been one of those that was sucked in by the ads. And that makes me wonder how many golfers do get sucked in and feel they need to have that Tiger Woods or Ashworth polo. How many golfers go out buy a $600 set of irons, a $300 driver and $100 putter when they're just taking up the game and aren't even sure if they like it or not yet?

Even worse, and the real question that fuels the stereotype is, how many people never take up the game because everything they see is so damn expensive? The clubs, the apparel, the courses...everything highlighted by the golf publications (both magazines and television) is the most expensive of what's available. It makes potential players feel that if they don't spend more money, they will be using inferior equipment, wearing the wrong apparel and playing poor courses. But in reality, nothing could be further from the truth.

In my opinion, this is just another problem facing the golf industry. Not only is there very little going on for the average hack like myself and my golfing buddies, but there is also very little for beginners. How do you expect to attract new players to the game, when you price most of them out of it right from the start?

I hope that anyone who may be new to the game is being guided by friends like mine. Because honestly, if I had to rely on the golf publications and fell victim to the "rich man's sport" stereotype, I would have quit the game long ago. And that's if I ever took it up to begin with.

Swing 'til you're happy...you can afford to if you do it right!

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Tiger's Back...And The Media Sure Is Letting Us Know About It!

So it looks like Tiger finally put an end to that 20 tournament losing streak. He wrapped up the WGC-Bridgestone, like he has so many times before. The longest winless streak of his career is over.

Now maybe he can just get back to his normal routine and just go back to being the same player he always...What? What do you mean he didn't win? I saw him on every sports news show on TV. I saw Tiger on ESPN constantly! He must have won!

Adam Scott you say? Well I knew he was playing well, but he couldn't possibly have beaten Tiger. 17 under?! He finished 18 strokes better than Tiger?! Well then, what the hell was I watching?!

Nope, my eyes and ears did not deceive me. Tiger was never really in the hunt after Day 1, but that doesn't stop the sports media. Rather than focusing on the guy who led the tournament from start to finish, we're focused on the guy who, after the first day, was never closer than six strokes back. Rather than pay attention to the guys who finished tied for 2nd (each shooting a final round 66), we're worried about the guy who only broke 70 once in the four rounds.

I get on the PGA's case for failing to properly promote its players on the tour. But I guess that's only part of the problem. Just as much of the problem, if not more, is the media. No matter what happens (on the course anyway) the media just can't get enough of Tiger. It's been 21 straight winless tournaments, but the media acts like it's just the opposite. Once again, it's "Tiger, Tiger, Tiger....oh, and by the way, blah blah blah won."

Need an example? Friday night, I tuned into Sportscenter. Before they even showed the results of the second round, there was an entire segment on Tiger's second round struggles, even though he was only three strokes off the day before. A few segments of the show later, we get to the actual highlights of the round. Here, we see a few more strokes and reactions from Tiger before we get to see anyone who is actually in contention. Need further proof? Check out this clip

Still leading off with Tiger. We have to wait through three of Tiger's putts before we hear about the guy who won. And there's barely even a mention of either Luke Donald or Rickie Fowler, who finished tied for second. And people wonder why the sport is in the shape it's in...

So here's a bit of a plea to the mainstream media - do the sport a favor and start focusing on some of the other great players on the tour. Please realize that, until he shows otherwise, Tiger is no longer the elite player he was. Until he shows otherwise, he is a middle-of-the-pack player. OK, benefit of the doubt due to his accomplishments...he's still a top-tier player. But he is NOT the Tiger of years past. And until the time comes that he does show otherwise, why not take the time to introduce us to, and promote the other great, young talent on the tour. It can do nothing but help the sport as a whole.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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It's Like That Tiger...Really?

In case you have not heard, Tiger Woods has decided to fire his long-time caddie Steve Williams. The same man who is perhaps the epitome of loyalty. Not only being a great caddie to Tiger, but also a close friend. Through all the crap that Tiger has been through, this man had his back.

This really boggles my mind. I would think that at a time like this you would want people like Mr. Williams around you. Let's face it though, Tiger hasn't really been too active on the tour this season. Which would result in Steve not having much work. I'm sure he's pretty busy but those pay days he used to get when Tiger won were pretty sweet. Now it seems like he's only a spectator.

So what compelled El Tigre to fire him? I mean is he going to carry the bag himself? I know alimony and child support can be a bitch but come on! No need to cut corners there. What kind of strategy has the caublanasian kid concocted? I guess we will have to wit and see.

Currently, Tiger has dropped to #20 in the world rankings, he changed his coach, he's battling injury and there's still fragmentation of his scandal floating around. I guess why not dump the best caddie you ever had? That'll fix the problems, right Tiger? This reminds me of Rocky 5 when Tommy Gunn drops team Balboa and goes with that Don King wannabe. The end result is never good. Maybe Tiger needs a visit from Mr. Balboa?

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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It's Christmas in July For Golfers

Two holiday season ago, I awoke to find that some items on my Christmas wish list were not under my tree. There was no $20,000 golf cart in my living room, nor were the $5,000 golf shoes I was looking to slip on. But that was my own fault. I waited way too long to get my Christmas list to my wife.

But fret not golfers. This year, I'm going to help you get your Christmas list started early. This way, you'll have plenty of time to get your wish list to the people who matter and, hopefully anyway, you won't feel the same disappointment I did. Let's get started!

Right off the bat, we'll start at the top of the list - the golf cart. A year-and-a-half ago, my list included a $20,000 Hummer (to which the Tiger Woods jokes were flying). But that's old news now. The new chariot of the golfing kings looks something like this:


That would be the Garia LSV. With its hand-stitched seats, digital instruments, stereo and refrigerator, the driver would want for nothing. But that's not all. The Garia, available in over 100 different colors, is also street-legal! Not that you would want to take its 25 MPH top speed onto your busy city streets, but for a mere $62,000...you can!

But with the extra money sunken into the cart, you'll probably have to suffer cutbacks somewhere else. Since you'll be riding, it makes most sense that it's the shoes that get cut back. So, we're going to skip the $5,000 John Lobb's in lieu of these:



These are the Royal Albatross golf shoes, retailing for the bargain basement price of only $750. OK, so they're not custom fit like the Lobb's, but they do have a leather sole, fast-twist cleats and they're waterproof. Plus, they come with two shoe bags and a ball marker. You know, I was a little iffy on the $750, but since they're throwing in the ball marker...

But let me show you this one. Now, it's the not the most expensive piece of golf equipment you'll ever see. But it certainly may be the most unique. Brought to you by William Henry Studios, a company more well-known for making heirloom quality knives which take over seven months to produce (as well as some beautiful writing instruments), is the D-3 Fairway; a divot tool of unimaginable beauty.

What is it that makes these divot tools so unique? Well, to start the handles are made from either hand-forged Damascus steel or mokume gane. The inlays can be made from either wood, coral, mother of pearl or...get this...fossil mammoth tooth! Included with this piece as well is a stainless-steel ball marker that can be personalized. But quite possibly the coolest feature about this tool (outside of the mammoth tooth inlay) is that it is spring-loaded. This means it works like a switch-blade knife. A little bit of old-school street thug is brought to the golf course! And for a mere $1,200, you too can feel like the Dutch Schultz of your local club.

So if you don't want to be let down on Christmas morning this year, take this list and pass it along to your significant other. Let them know that they still have just over five months to figure out the best way to say "Happy Holidays" using the list above. Need some more choices? Don't be afraid to revert to the original. Of course, don't be afraid to sneak your own items onto the list. There is still, after all, the $53,000 set of Honma golf clubs...

Swing 'til you're happy!

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The Games we Play on the Golf Course

No, I'm not talking about match- or stroke-play. Nor am I talking about Nassau, bingo bango bongo or any other golf betting games. I'm talking about the games we invent while trekking though 18-holes of wretchedly-played golf.

For example, you've all heard of the Red Tee Salute? Fellas, you know what I'm talking about - when you don't hit your drive past the Women's tees and you are told to play the rest of the hole with your pants around your ankles? The only problem with this game is it's rarely enforced - which is probably for the best.

What about the "closest to the tee marker" game? This is where you stand a bit behind the tee markers and soft-toss golf balls towards them in a bocce-like manner. If you hit the marker you win, unless another person in your foursome hits it too, which will force a one-toss playoff. Good fun indeed.

Heck, even before the round we're playing games. Ever spin a tee in the air to get the hitting order of your foursome? This is our buddy Stinky Golfer Tom's favorite part of golf (seriously, it's all downhill for Tom from there).

Interestingly, if it wasn't for slow play, some of these games would never exist. Take golf-hockey for instance - you know that one - it's where you're waiting on the tee and one guy plays goalie between the tee-box markers while another tries to shoot and score. This is fun till someone takes it in the shin.

Meanwhile, some games are played on the go - like the one where you toss your ball onto the tee-box as you approach in a cart. Though I never really figured out the object of this game - is it to hit the tee marker, or is it just to land it close to one of them? Perhaps it's to get it right between the markers (like right where you're going to tee-it-up). Not that it matters - most of us like throwing objects at other objects anyway so, let the games begin.

I have a new game I'd like to run by you. It stems from people who dress like they have scratch handicaps and then proceed to hack-up the course. I think everyone should come to the course dressed nicely but bring a bag filled with older, worn-out and cheap clothes. Every terrible shot you hit, you have to replace an article of clothing you're wearing with one from the crappy clothes bag. Whoever is dressed the worst at the end of the round has to buy the drinks in the 19th-hole. Thoughts?

Finally, every decent golfer I know (handicap under 10) can bounce a ball off one of their irons multiple times a la Tiger Woods. I myself can keep it going for about three bounces and then it drops. It sucks I stink at that since the game seems like a good time-waster if you're stuck behind Shanks, Hook, Skull and Slice.

But how much do you have to practice to be really good at bouncing a ball off the club face? Perhaps it takes a decent amount of hand-eye coordination that I (or other "average" golfers) don't have? Hmmm. Maybe we should tell people who are thinking about taking up golf to practice bouncing a ball off a club for a few days. If they can't keep it going for more than 10 in a row, perhaps they should try tennis instead - it will save them years of anguish.

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Golf: A Royal And Ancient Mess

With the marriage of Prince William and Kate Middleton today, the whole relationship thing was on my mind. As long as there have been relationships, there has also been something to screw them up. That being said, why does it seem like golf is associated with one of those things?

Whenever I want to golf, there's an issue. I'll bet that if I just lay on the couch all morning there wouldn't be a problem. As soon as I say I'm going golfing...world war III erupts and the garage needs to be organized. Wait a minute, laying on the couch is a viable reason to NOT do work around the house?

So, is there really an underlying reason why golf is a catalyst for quarreling? Maybe it's not just the actual golfing that's a problem. Could it be the extra-curricular activities after the round that ruffle the feathers? After some self-analysis I've come to the much researched conclusion that sand traps are like bars...rarely do I get out after one shot.

Now, I'm pretty sure there's a few golfers that get stuck at their local "sand trap" but, in my case there are potential dangers. This could lead to coming home late, which leads to friction and problems on the home front, which could possibly lead to an unfortunate result - the ol' split up. Golf is already an expensive sport, who would have thought it could drain you for half your net worth too?

Looking at this on a grand scale, we can use Tiger Woods, Ernie Els, Boo Weekley and Mark Calcavecchia as examples. They shelled-out a lot of dough to their ex's. All I'm saying is, don't be statistic and take a second to analyze your situations...Do the right thing.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

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Why I'm Happy Tiger Didn't Win The Masters

Before anyone gets the wrong idea about the title of this post, I'll explain. It has nothing to do with Tiger as a person. Tiger as a person will forever be viewed as, lets say, not the nicest guy you've ever heard of. But that has no bearing on this particular post.

It also has nothing to do with Tiger's ego. You know, that ego that never just comes out and says, "He played better than me." Rather, the ego just makes excuses for why he lost. That also has no bearing on this post. Nope, it's none of those things.

What makes me happy about it is the fact that, for a few days anyway, the younger and/or lesser known players on the tour got a good amount of attention at a major! Whether the PGA knows it or not, this is just what they needed! Tiger made his charge, but Charl Schwartzel played out of his mind down the stretch! Despite his Sunday meltdown, Rory Mcilroy was the biggest news for the first three days of the tournament. Some nice performances by Adam Scott, Jason Day, Luke Donald and a good Sunday from Justin Rose may have helped the PGA out by helping to improve its deficiency in the player recognition department.

As we here at Golfstinks have said previously, too many golf fans have no idea who some of these great players on the tour are. So to see some of them withstand the Tiger Woods charge, and play right along side him, if not better, the PGA couldn't ask for anything more! Some of these players are the tour's future. These players are the guys people need to know about when a tour stop comes along that Tiger doesn't think he can win (i.e. he's not participating).

We all know viewership drops when Tiger isn't there. And turnout at the tour stop itself is considerably lower. But it would probably be different if these other players were promoted properly, or even half as much as Tiger. So maybe the PGA will take this opportunity and use these performance that are fresh in the minds of golf fans.

At some point, the PGA is going to have to realize that Tiger is not going to be around forever. Better yet they should realize, for one or two reasons, the landscape of golf is changing. Either Tiger is not the player he once was, or the other players have simply caught up and no longer fear him. Either way, it's time for the PGA to take advantage.

I'm tired of having to see where Tiger finished in every update. I see that Charl Schwartzel won, but immediately after that - Tiger Woods finishes fourth (-10). What about 2nd and 3rd? What about the two guys who tied for fourth with Tiger? This is exactly what I'm talking about above. It's time for the PGA, and the media, to jump on the bandwagon of some players other than Tiger.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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Fans Love A Good Rivalry

Ah...the rivalry games. You don't have to be a baseball fan to understand the significance of Red Sox-Yankees. Just the same for Lakers-Celtics, Packers-Bears, North Carolina-Duke, etc... That list can go on and on.

There are the all-time great rivalries like those mentioned above. There are the rivalries that last for a few years while two teams are both hot. There are local or in-state rivalries that may not have a huge national impact, but mean the world to the fans of the two teams. The bottom line is...fans love rivalries.

But I just recently came across an old article (roughly two years old, the article is not dated) touting golf's ten greatest rivalries. When I first came across this article, I felt I stumbled onto something interesting. Something that may help promote the sport to a new generation by focusing on or creating rivalries. Instead, I found the same old golf stuffiness. Seriously now...what is it about golf and golf writers that simply won't allow the sport to advance into the future? What do I mean? Here, I'll show you.

Moving through the list from 10 through 1:

#10 - USA vs. Sergio Garcia. For starters, this is not a rivalry. This is just a golfer who claims to dislike Americans. In return, many American golf fans dislike him. Further,Sergio Garcia is of relative insignificance. He has only two PGA Tour wins in the past five years and hasn't won multiple tourneys since 2004. So who cares about Sergio? But, other than his comments about beating Americans and spitting in the cup...one of the reasons people don't like him is his celebrations. I disagree here. I like the emotion. I would like to see more of it from other golfers. I'm tired of the "tip-of-the-cap." Celebrate a great shot a little. Don't rehearse it. I don't want to see a T.O. But don't be afraid to show a bit of emotion. Make the game more fun.

#9 - Pebble Beach vs. Augusta. Again, this is not a rivalry. This is like saying Yankee Stadium vs. Fenway. It's great for comparisons sake - one is big, extravagant and new, the other quaint, traditional and full of character. But neither has anything to do with the games themselves. It would be Yankees-Red Sox even if the game was on a neutral field. Sure you could make the argument that playing in each other's stadiums adds to the rivalry, but in golf, those two courses have nothing to do with an actual rivalry between players. They are just two courses. Albeit, two dream courses...but just courses nonetheless.

#8 - Robert T. Jones Jr. vs. Rees Jones. Once again...who cares? The average golf fan doesn't give a crap about this. So two brothers don't get along. OK, so it's a family rivalry. But it has nothing to do with the sport itself. They just both happen to be golf course designers. Meaningless.

#7 - Sarazen vs. Hagen - Hey!! We're four in and we actually have a player rivalry! It's what golf fans care about! Although, they do only mention one match and it happens to be almost 80 years old. Otherwise...I'll take it. They are after all, two of the greatest of all time.

#6 - Greg Norman vs. Tim Finchem - One is an all-time great golfer. The other is the commissioner. It's two guys who don't get along...but it's not a rivalry! Not in the sense that I want anyway. Not only that, but it's not exactly Pete Rose vs. Bart Giamatti.

#5 - Tradition vs. Technology - GET OVER IT ALREADY!! The game has advanced. It's going to continue to advance. Just let it happen!! Equipment is going to become easier to use. Technology will make the game easier for some. Does that ruin the game? Of course not! Besides, isn't it fun to think to yourself.."I know Tiger is great...but can you imagine what Bobby Jones would do with a set of Tiger's clubs?" Oh, and by the way, "tradition vs. technology" is, once again, not a rivalry.

#4 - Jack Nicklaus vs. Tom Watson - No argument here.

#3 - Sam Snead vs. Ben Hogan - Ditto.

#2 - Arnold Palmer vs. Jack Nicklaus - My only issue with this one is, how is it NOT #1?!

#1 - Tiger Woods vs. Old Man Time - Oh...because Tiger had to be involved in the #1 ranking somehow. Sports Illustrated and Golf magazine were, of course, busy kissing Tiger's ass. Tiger vs. Old Man Time? Are you kidding? He injured his knee!! How is that a rivalry???!!! Worse yet...how is that a better rivalry than Arnie vs. Jack?! What a joke.

See, I've mentioned before that I believe the PGA does a crappy job of promoting it's players. No one, save the hardcore golf fans, has any idea who half the players on the tour are. Want to promote these players a little better? Then create some rivalries! Give us a reason to watch! Build up a match! Don't give us a crappy top ten list that shows only four actual rivalries, and none of the current!

The PGA could do so much better...but they don't. In the meantime...fewer and fewer people care. Fewer and fewer people take up the game. Fewer and fewer rounds are played every year. Fewer and fewer members of the younger generations show interest in the game...and #5 on the above list is part of the problem, not one of the "greatest rivalries."

Swing 'til you're happy...and find your own top ten reasons to do so.

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Golf Course Bankrupt? Blame Tiger Woods

In this recent recession, some big investment banks were rescued from a mess that company spokespeople claimed they didn't need to be rescued from. Nevertheless, they were labeled as "too big to fail" and were pulled to safety on the public's dime.

Meanwhile, golf courses have been buckling under current economic conditions those aforementioned banks had a hand in creating. The last five years have not been kind to courses in the United States. But recent data from the National Golf Foundation (NGF) suggests golf facilities in general are holding their ground fairly well.

A preview of The NGF's Golf Facilities in the U.S. report, 2011 edition (which will be released in February) reveals course closures from 2006-2010 represent just 1.5 percent of courses overall. In 2010, the figure was less than half of one percent. These statistics prompted the NGF to state the following: "Considering the severity of the recession, one could argue that golf has held its ground reasonably well."

However, despite NGF's positive spin, the raw numbers still reveal a glaring issue: Every year since 2006, more golf courses have closed in the U.S. than have opened. For example, last year saw 107 18-hole courses bite the dust, while only 46 were born. But does the recession deserve all the blame?

Remember the days (late 1990's and early 2000's) when new courses were sprouting up like daisies? And these weren't shabby municipal tracks either - many were high-end daily fee courses that featured sharp grooming and sweet facilities. I remember one such place in my area - Pistol Creek Golf Club. It was a great course (see photo at top) with a good layout, awesome grooming and a dandy club house. It opened in 2001 and closed in 2005. Why?

If you're observant, you'll note that the year it closed (2005) is well before the current recession even started. Even 2006, which is when course closures began outpacing course openings in the U.S., was a full year before the effects of the subprime market started taking hold. So it's obvious golf courses have been suffering for a while - certainly longer than the current recession.

The NGF gives a clue as to why in the headline of their press release: "NGF 2010 Openings/Closures Summary - Market Correction of Supply/Demand Imbalance Continue." Simply put, they built too many damn courses for the number of golfers out there! So the next appropriate question would be; why?

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say it has something to do with Tiger Woods. Now I don't have any data to back this up, but imagine it's 1999 and you want to build a golf course. I'd give good odds that Tiger would be mentioned somewhere in your business plan or your pitch to the city council: "It's this Tiger Woods, man! He's changing the game!"

But did the golf industry over-estimate the impact of the Tiger phenomenon? Sure, he was good for the game, but perhaps his presence caused too many investors, architects and designers to jump on the bandwagon and simply overdo-it. Of course, this is all just speculation, but it seems entirely plausible.

So if the juggernaut that Tiger Woods once was compelled shiny new golf courses to be stacked upon the proverbial camel's back, then the recession was only the proverbial straw. Golf, after all, is a luxury. And luxurious things are usually the first to go when money gets tight. Still, losing only 1.5 percent of courses over the past 5 years isn't terrible. But it sends a clear message: "Market Correction of Supply/Demand Imbalance" is just a nice way of saying the golf industry is shrinking, not growing.

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The Breaking of Golf's Color Barrier

Breaking down racial barriers. Isn't that what it was all about for Martin Luther King? So in celebration of Martin Luther King Day, why not take a look at the PGA Tour's breaker of the color barrier?

Contrary to what many believe, know, or understand, the PGA color barrier was broken long before Tiger Woods ever hit the scene. Over 35 years earlier to be a bit more specific.

In 1961, Charlie Sifford became the first African-American to receive full PGA Tour status (In 1928, Dewy Brown was the first African-American to play in PGA Tour events, but was not given full status until the mid 1960's). But it wasn't until after nine years of playing in qualifiers and non-PGA Tour events, even winning one, that he was given full status. Sifford went on to win two events in his career, plus a Senior Tour victory.

But here we are, 50 years later, and almost no progress has been made on the tour, especially when compared to the other major sports in the United States. Since the most famous sports color barrier of all was broken by Jackie Robinson in 1947, the result is that currently 1 in every 10 MLB players is African-American. The NFL color barrier was broken in the 1940's, and currently 65% of the NFL's players are African-American. In 1950, the NBA's color barrier was broken and currently 82% of the league is African-American. Even in the NHL, whose color barrier was broken (albeit incredibly briefly) in 1958, about 5% of the league is African-American.

But the PGA continues to lag. Of all current PGA Tour players, only one, Tiger Woods, is African-American...and he is actually bi-racial. So where is the breakdown? Why has no progress been made? Has it actually taken a step backward? These are all questions for another time. But I will say, it's tough to blame the PGA. Between organizations like The First Tee, among others, the PGA has certainly attempted to expand their brand, as well as the sport itself, among the African-American community.

But with February almost upon us, Black History Month would likely be a good time to spread the name of the PGA's first man to break the color barrier. If not to help promote the game and the tour, then to help more people learn about one of the most important historical figures in the games modern era - Charlie Sifford.

Swing 'til you're happy!

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